This photo lacks a background showing the microwaving of a kitten…

… but the captain of Pace University’s football team has managed to squeeze a lot of striking if slightly incoherent stuff into this picture… the Confederate flag… the Ku Klux Klan… the Nazi salute…

Some students got hold of it and complained, and now Tyler Owens is suspended from the team.

I think before doing a major official wee-wee on the White House lawn, the school should … Well, as the joke about the strong brew in an Australian town has it, the koala-tea of Mercy is not strained. Give the jerk a break.

Ok, so I love the Barbie Jeep.

American ingenuity at its best.

Plus she’s way quotable.

“Most people don’t find the things my friends and I do very funny, just immature, so I didn’t expect to get this big of reaction.” [SOS did some light editing on this statement.]

A GW Student is Missing in South Africa.

He had gone swimming “in the East Cape Province on Sunday, on the country’s ‘Wild Coast,’” and has not been seen since then.


Nicholas Upton has drowned.

“Went in dumb come out dumb too”

While reading this, sing this.

FSU football player Dalvin Cook has been…

… acquitted of a misdemeanor battery charge. A jury quickly agreed that he did not punch a woman as he and teammates were leaving a bar.

Things That Go Through UD’s Head When She Reads a Fraternity Brother at the University of Florida Defend His Fraternity.

1.) My fraternity brothers were preparing for finals at the University of Florida…

University of Florida! Are you kidding me? That university was just ranked number one in America for most athletes arrested!… Oh whoops. Let me concentrate on the matter at hand. Fraternities. Ok. Frat boys studying for finals…? Uh… ok….


when word echoed throughout Zeta Beta Tau that we were being blamed for unthinkable behavior: harassing combat-wounded veterans.

Linda Cope, the founder of the Warrior Beach Retreat, a local charity in Panama City Beach, appeared on Fox News and other media outlets alleging that we spit on veterans and urinated on the American flag.

Panama City Beach? Are you kidding me? The rankest town in America, where three men raped an unconscious woman on the beach midday and no one did a thing… It was only discovered when the police chief reviewed video in connection with a slew of other crimes. … But ahem. Let me once again concentrate on the matter at hand. Spring break, unspeakable acts…


We went from being anonymous college students to being the most hated fraternity in America over allegations that, to us, came completely out of left field.

Completely? Says here (see response from the national chapter at the bottom of the page) that “What was not pointed out was that at the time these events occurred, the chapter was already on probation imposed by the University of Florida.”


Many of us have family members who have proudly served in the military. My grandfather fought during D-Day. I have a photograph of my grandfather sitting on the wing of a captured German fighter plane.

The focal point of our chapter house’s living room was an American flag that we proudly displayed.

That’s all great. Great. But, you know, the male bonding that you love so much … too much… “Witnessing the tears and anguish of my brothers at the moment school officials clarified that our chapter had been officially closed was indescribably painful… [Nothing can adequately convey] the heartbreak and devastation that I and my fraternity brothers feel over losing an organization that we loved so dearly. Many of my brothers feel they have lost their collegiate identity.” … plus alcohol, can make you forget how much you love Old Glory…


Due process was conveniently cast aside to mollify an angry public that deemed the allegations indisputably factual in light of the stereotypical fraternity culture portrayed in the media.

Yes, it looks as though your fraternity didn’t behave as outrageously as initial reports suggested. Maybe you’re right to be upset that the resounding response from America to this clarification of your Panama City Beach behavior is So fucking what. But you go to the University of Florida, you’re a member of a fraternity already on probation, and your guys were part of ongoing, high-profile Panama City Beach foulness. Sorry.


With no means to defend ourselves, we had no choice but to watch our execution in the court of public opinion.

Soyez tranquille! Guns are on their way. Once you’re fully weaponized, no one will be able to shut you down.

“Vivenzio also accuses the fraternity of operating like a gang.”

When does a bikers’ club become a gang? When does a college fraternity become a gang? When does a football team become a gang? This blog has covered the Waco shootout, the Michael Deng killing, the Vanderbilt rapes, the San Diego State fraternity drug markets, etc., etc. These activities sure look to her like organized gang activity, subject to gang-specific enhanced legal penalties.

The Penn State frat in question here (Penn State! It can really afford more sagas of sordid men.), already in trouble for all kinds of shit, is accused of

obtaining some of its funding by converting the pre-paid food plans of its pledges and confiscating and selling their prescription drugs. These funds were then used to pay for countless socials, presocials and parties at the fraternity house at which underage students were plied with alcohol and, in some cases, with drugs to facilitate sexual assault and abuse.


“The fraternity has since stopped burning its name into members, [its attorney] said.”

Members’ members? Or just members?

“When we said that ‘Kipnis does not speak for us,’ we lent credence to the idea that Kipnis was responsible for speaking for us in the first place.”

A Northwestern University student, reflecting on the Laura Kipnis fiasco, targets groupthink. He’s absolutely right.

A walk down…

Memory Lane.

“Northwestern University is spending thousands of dollars to hire attorneys to investigate a professor for the content of an essay and subsequent tweets because some members of the university community were offended.”

Laura Kipnis (see poem) is “cleared” of “wrongdoing.”

Oh thank you, thank you, Northwestern attorneys, for exonerating Kipnis from having written something that offended someone.

Good news for your struggling profession, no? Now that we know how easy it is for American professors to get hauled up on charges, all you have to do is advertise in campus newspapers. Have you ever been offended by one of your professors? Contact us NOW.

Fraternities: Places to make…

new friends!

“One single, frightful stab of pain coursed through her, made her go rigid in the bonds and wrenched a scream from her lips, and she never knew who it was who had, with both branding irons at once, seared the flesh of her buttocks, nor whose voice had counted slowly up to five, nor whose hand had given the signal to withdraw the irons.”

The ladies of Dartmouth’s Alpha Delta fraternity like a good branding every bit as much as O did and why not? Like O, they wish to show both passion and obedience to their house overlords… It’s the way of fraternities…

And now Dartmouth has decommissioned them or whatever you call it when universities decide they’ve had enough and they want a fraternity out. Now.

Branded! Scorned as the ones who brand. What do you do when you’re branded, and you’ve no house or land?

Well, you go crying to the Hanover New Hampshire Zoning Board of Adjustment is what you do. No one wants you – Dartmouth doesn’t want you, and Hanover doesn’t want you (“the loss of college recognition means that, under town zoning ordinances, the fraternity may no longer serve as a residence”) – but you want you, with all your long history of naughty naughty ways (the branding’s just Part One).

Last month, the presence of members in the house …spurred a violation notice from Hanover Zoning Administrator Judith Brotman, who informed the fraternity brothers they were no longer allowed to live in the building. In her April 23 letter, Brotman said that “at least 18 individuals” were still on the premises and that continued occupancy would draw a daily fine of $275.

“You typically don’t want so many people living in one building in a residential neighborhood,” Brotman said in an interview Tuesday afternoon. “It’s a health thing.”

As long as Dartmouth was around to clean up its vomit, as it were, Alpha Delta could continue to live in Hanover; without recognition from the school, its grand Greekdom becomes just another nameless faceless all-male cult, largely indistinguishable from the breastaurant-bred, branded boys of Waco.

In fact UD proposes that the Alpha Delta 18 join forces with the Waco 170. Once the AD 18 lose their appeal to the Zoning Board, they’re going to need protection as they hunker down in the only home they’ve ever known. The Cossacks are real well armed.

“90 percent of Chinese applicants [to American universities] submit fake recommendations, 70 percent have other people write their essays, 50 percent have forged high school transcripts, and 10 percent list academic awards and other achievements they did not receive.”

Most of our schools have built up — call it a great wall — of denial about this. Too much money involved to mess with it.

What do you have to do to be suspended for…


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