See? Told you. Lawsuits are being threatened. Everyone’s hysterical. Doing away with clubs at Harvard isn’t going to happen.

Outraged Twitter feeds abound.

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You don’t get these outcomes – you don’t get a whole culture like this – without the character-formation that happens for many in the frats and the clubs.

As I said in an earlier post, these places are structural to our country’s economic success because they help make these people:

At Peter’s memorial service in 2015 — held in a place he loved, with sweeping views of the Pacific — a young associate from his firm stood up to speak of their friendship and of the bands they sometimes went to see together, only to break down in tears. Quite a few of the lawyers attending the service were bent over their phones, reading and tapping out emails.

Their friend and colleague was dead, and yet they couldn’t stop working long enough to listen to what was being said about him.

And these people:

Wall Street CEOs like to think they are the adults, the big men in the room, the ones who know how the world works. Well, you know what? They screwed up their own banks, the financial system, and the economy like a bunch of two-year-olds. Every single major bank would have failed in late 2008 without massive government intervention — because of wounds that were entirely self-inflicted. (Citigroup: holding onto hundreds of billions of dollars of its own toxic waste. Bank of America: paying $50 billion for an investment bank that would have failed within three days. Morgan Stanley and Goldman Sachs: levering up without a stable source of funding. Etc.) The financial crisis should have put to rest for a generation the idea that the big boys on Wall Street know what they’re doing and the politicians in Washington are a bunch of amateurs. Yet somehow the bankers came out of it with the same unshakable belief in their own perfection that they had in 2005. The only plausible explanation is some kind of powerful personality disorder.

They’re making another, similar, version of these people at Penn State. They’re making them at most of our universities. You couldn’t have Wall Street without them. You couldn’t have Marc Kasowitz without them. You couldn’t have (had) Lehman Brothers without them. You couldn’t have contemporary America without them.

So Niall Ferguson doesn’t have to huff and puff. The clubs are where you learn high-level substance abuse and arrant indifference – the heart of our red-hot economy. They’re not going anywhere.

**************

UD thanks Jack.

Best tweet so far after Rick Perry’s supply and demand comments.

His comments are here.

The reporter reminds us that in a presidential debate Perry famously could not remember the third federal agency he planned to shut down. (“The third agency of government I would do away with — the education, uh, the, uh, commerce and let’s see… I can’t — the third one. Sorry. Oops.”)

Here’s the tweet:


Andrew Hess‏
@AndrewHess77

The third agency he was going to shut down was the Department of Basic Fucking Economics.

Fourth of July Singalong

A song to Martin Shkreli from his attorney, Benjamin Brafman.

*************************

Sing it with me.

“Keep your damn mouth shut, Shkreli,
Til I say your trial’s a wrap.
Gag order’s coming, Shkreli.
Shut. Your. Trap.

Down Riker’s Lane we’ll wander,
Dumbfuck you and I.
Keep your damn mouth shut, Shkreli.
Repent! The end is nigh.”

Ask a silly question…

[Josiah Austin] placed what ended up totaling $4.8 million in Elea Capital, a hedge fund that [Martin] Shkreli started, in 2007.

“To make money,” Austin said, when asked why he did so.

The Irony of Martin Shkreli Demanding a Discount is…

doubleplusgood.

Scandevasia.

[A]lmost all Swiss bank accounts set up by Scandinavians are being used for tax evasion.

Drug Opera

The producers of the soap opera General Hospital have worked out a deal with a pharma company to give one of the show’s characters a rare disease only the company’s drug can treat.

UD admires this marketing as much as she did the toy blocks with the name of a powerful antipsychotic on them.

Another favorite sales tool that began to be distributed in the waiting rooms of [pediatricians] were Legos imprinted with a Risperdal logo.

It’s our country’s most amazing, most expanding, frontier: Already a huge number of ads that interrupt soap operas are for anti-depressants, etc. etc. Now the shows themselves push controlled substances.

****************

UD sees a new tv comedy set in a hapless but adorable oxycodone clinic. Lil’s Pill Mill is run by a brassy wisecracking distributor with a heart of gold and her tattooed boyfriend Scooter who powers into the West Virginia hollers on his Harley to make deliveries. The simple but desperate mountain folk are colorful and hilarious. Each week brings a new challenge as the LPM staff seeks to evade detection by government agents, or as Lil suspects Scooter’s got “special friends” who turn tricks for him in exchange for the oxy.

Attention, University Development Offices!

Keep your eye on DEA/FBI raids of pill mills. One clinic operator currently on trial for everything from “violations of the RICO organized crime statute to illegal drug distribution to kickbacks to wire and mail fraud to money laundering” decided it was too dangerous to pocket the money he got for talking up his corporate drug supplier’s big drug – because a doc now in jail in Michigan for the same shit this guy’s on trial for pocketed his pharma money and look what happened to him.

So here’s what this guy decided to do, in order not to attract attention from the government.

[One] batch of emails [discussed in the trial] concerned [Xiulu] Ruan’s handling of the fees he collected for speaking for Insys. … Ruan … changed his procedure for handling the money after the Michigan case flared up… Rather than receiving the money, he’d begun routing the fees to various educational institutions, directly or through a charitable foundation, with recipients including the Medical College of Wisconsin and the University of South Alabama.

Good man! Good man! And there’s every reason why your university can also be the beneficiary of alleged drug dealers trying to hide their money from government investigators. Just set up a lunch with the most prominent pusher in your town and suggest your campus as a routing location.

“The pharmaceutical industry realized that they can no longer directly go to doctors to get them to prescribe their pills. Various regulations were put in place to prevent them giving gifts and pens and hats and things that we do know can influence doctor prescribing. So instead they took a kind of Trojan horse approach and infiltrated regulatory agencies and academic medicine in order to convince doctors that prescribing more opioids was evidence-based medicine…”

Academic medicine: That’s where University Diaries comes in.

The family whose name emblazons med schools and med school professorships all over this country – the Sacklers – is the same family addicting America and soon the rest of the world with OxyContin. It couldn’t have done it – it can’t keep doing it – without university researchers and clinicians lying for it in exchange for money.

Now that the opioid epidemic is so deadly that politicians and journalists can’t help noticing it, we will look forward, on this blog, to publishing the names of all the professors who did their bit to make a hideous drug respectable.

“The first unauthorized use of the credit card occurred on Feb. 19, 2002, when Rathmann’s credit card was used to pay Bolivar Insulation in the amount of $1,249. The last unauthorized use of the credit card was on Aug. 20, 2015, when Rathmann’s credit card was used to pay an invoice from Ozark Mountain Pest Control in the amount of $30.”

More news (see post below this one) from the University of Missouri, which didn’t notice a thing for thirteen years.

“We think it’s great when you can get some perks for the hard work you put into achieving success. So when you apply to The University of Alabama School of Law, we will give you a $30 Amazon gift card and waive your application fee.”

UD‘s friend Courtney, applying to law school, received this.

Waiving application fees is now apparently pretty standard; the Amazon gift card is, I think, something new.

**************

Update: Also on offer: Starbucks cards and hundreds of dollars worth of travel expenses. (See this post’s comment thread.)

So reasonable. Why not ask for more?

In 2006, Trump said … [a] “terribly written” book had defamed him [by saying he was worth far less than what he claims], and he demanded $5 billion in damages.

… Trump sat for a two-day deposition for the case in 2007, during which he made a series of false statements… A New Jersey appeals court ruled in [the book’s author’s] favor in 2011.

Foundations of Western Universities.

The university foundation – the shady organization of rich boosters who want to do nice things for a particular university without having to be bound by the board of trustees and other pesky official organizations/rules – is often a very naughty thing. Sometimes it’s a slush fund for the president and his or her cronies, as at the University of Louisville, where its main function was loading more and more dollars onto the president’s personal haul. God only knows (channeling the Beach Boys) what many campuses’ sports and administration figures would do without The Foundation.

Iowa State University, the inspiration for Jane Smiley’s novel, Moo, has a typical foundation. It buys stuff the administration is too embarrassed, or legally unable, to buy. Until ISU’s president crash-landed one of the planes the foundation bought, no one seems to have been prompted to ask what Sen. Herman Quirmbach, D-Ames, has asked: “Why does a university need to buy a plane at all?”

In answering that question, UD has always sought the guidance of Purdue University trustee Joanne Brouillette:

Excluding one flight to Naples with several other trustees and administrators, [Purdue University trustee JoAnn] Brouillette’s [twelve private, university-paid] flights [since the beginning of 2008] were to and from Fort Wayne, Ind., only spending 30 minutes in the air. Out of these flights, five of them carried no other passengers.

Big people like go UP and DOWN and UP and DOWN and UP and DOWN!

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UD thanks dmf.

The national…

fabric.

Uh-oh.

The U of Smell is about to smell to even higher heaven.

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