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“Lawyers for Drabinsky and Gottlieb had asked for conditional sentences or house arrest, with community service that could include lectures at business and theatre schools across the country.”

And this is just one case among many. Instead of sending fraudsters and insider traders and extortionists etc. to jail, their lawyers increasingly argue, sentence them to lecture in business schools.

Can you see where my mind’s going on this? We’ve got an economic crisis in this country (and in Canada, where Professors-to-be Drabinsky and Gottlieb live), and our universities are way stressed out. We’ve also got an ever-growing cadre of sophisticated businesspeople suddenly faced with a prison-or-community-service dilemma.

Hire them! Hire them all! They know a lot, and many of them are colorful characters who’d make good lecturers. And they don’t cost anything.

Take Ezra Merkin. Why shouldn’t Yeshiva University take him back? He was a trustee there for years; now he can be a lecturer.

Austerity measure bonus: Yeshiva probably still has stationery with his name on it.

Business school professors are expensive. If there were, say, a lottery system in which universities could bid on an active list of HAAs (House Arrest Adjuncts), some universities might be able to suspend their regular faculty altogether.

Margaret Soltan, February 11, 2010 9:48AM
Posted in: beware the b-school boys

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