… sport, not to be entered into lightly, since they’ll certainly all sue.

As Virginia’s governor threatens to fire U Va’s entire board unless they resolve their now-notorious governance issues, UD reminds you of the tale of Diamandopoulos And The Eighteen Dwarves.

Many years ago little Adelphi University hired Peter Diamandopoulos as its president. He instantly set about putting business cronies on the board with whom the university, with flagrant conflict of interest, did all kinds of business. The board showed its gratitude by granting him insane salary increases and perks (a fancy Manhattan condo, etc.) and anything else he wanted. At one point he had the second-highest compensation of any American university president. Meanwhile enrollment fell by forty percent, the school’s ranking tanked, and faculty were really, really pissed – especially when certain details of the man’s, er, lifestyle were made public.

Entertaining his old friend on the board, John Silber, over dinner and drinks ended up costing Adelphi $546. Dr. Silber was president and is now chancellor of Boston University.

The next day, food and drinks with another trustee, Hilton Kramer, and a second guest cost the university $707. Mr. Kramer is The New York Observer’s art critic and a media critic for The New York Post.

The meal charges were actually modest; it was the bar tab that drove up the grand total. The bill was $454 for the 1982 Brion wine and Martell 100 cognac that Dr. Silber and Dr. Diamandopoulos drank. And the 1983 Chaval and Martell that he and Mr. Kramer sipped cost $552.

… Among Dr. Diamandopoulos’s expenses highlighted by Amy Gladstein, a lawyer for the Coalition to Save Adelphi, was a $579 pen he ordered for Ernesta Procope to celebrate her election as board chairwoman.

There was also the $82,314 Mercedes that Adelphi provided to Dr. Diamandopoulos.

Those were the good old days! Silber also showed his gratitude: When Adelphi finally dumped Diamandopoulos, Silber gave him a philosophy professorship at Boston University.

Okay, so the Virginia story isn’t about excessive compensation and conflict of interest; but behind all of Diamandopoulos’s money-mongering was his impatience to revolutionize Adelphi and make it a model of go-go corporate activity — exactly the motive of Helen Dragas and various hedgies on the board at U Va, for whom Teresa Sullivan was too academic, too incrementalist…

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Anyway. If the governor dumps the board (it’s unlikely to happen – the board is likely to reappoint Sullivan), expect the board to sue to regain their seats. Adelphi’s, with much huffing and puffing, did: “We will go to the ends of the earth to rectify this gross injustice,” wrote Ernesta with her Amazing Pen.

That suit went nowhere, but the one demanding money back from Diamandopoulos and the dwarves did quite well, netting millions from them. Heigh ho.