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“That appalling apathy about scholarship means we must leverage the public’s affection for football to save academics.”

But why save academics? When you live in an appallingly apathetic state, a state actively hostile to the mind, why have public universities? America is a big rich country crawling with universities – I’m pretty sure almost everyone in Louisiana has the means to get in a car and drive to a neighboring state. Almost everyone in Nevada or Montana or New Mexico can do the same. Designate certain states university-free zones and have states near them extend in-state tuition arrangements to people from those states who want to attend a university.

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No, no, UD isn’t proposing doing away with the football teams in the no-go states. Keep the teams, and keep “university” in their names. Since football is the only university thing state residents like, maintain state subsidies for it. No one will complain, especially since whatever state funds designated for universities still exist could now in their entirety be given over to the football team.

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If you fail to adopt this approach, you risk the circularity exhibited in this amusing Times-Picayune opinion piece, which calls for Louisiana State University football players to threaten a strike in order to save the university as an academic institution.

If star players could be persuaded to demand greater funding for our school, the public would listen and respond. Better yet, if … the football team [would] threaten a strike until the governor and legislators fully fund the university, we could achieve transformational change.

After all:

Many fans don’t care about the quality of LSU’s academic programs. They don’t care if the school cannot attract and retain top professors. They don’t care that many young people are leaving Louisiana for schools in other states because of uncertainty about our higher education system.

What people do care about – and deeply – is college football. In fact, many people support LSU’s academic mission only because they know that hiring a few hundred professors and instructors is the price they must pay to field a football team. As you and I know, many fans regard our institution as a sports enterprise with History and English departments on the side.

Which begs a question. Why be compelled to order with your meal sides you don’t like? I’ll have a football team with… Do I have to order sides? Yes, you must order two sides. Let’s see… English… History… Do you have any non-academic sides? No. Okay… Give me English and History but just a little bit …

Time to change Louisiana’s menu to cheeseburger cheeseburger cheeseburger.

Margaret Soltan, December 5, 2015 7:31AM
Posted in: sport

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14 Responses to ““That appalling apathy about scholarship means we must leverage the public’s affection for football to save academics.””

  1. dmf Says:

    what and lose the sports taxes/fees from students, not to mention all the student debt the republicans at the federal level are cashing in on?

    on a more serious note would actually be good to shut down many of the four year + institutions (keep the research/teaching hospitals) and put some of that money back into primary ed and their miserable community colleges (now stuck trying to make up for the terrible k-12 ed), one can dream…

  2. charlie Says:

    UD, you have this all wrong. The football team needs a university it can be proud of!

    BTW, it’s “Cheeseburgee, cheeseburgee, cheeseburgee….”

  3. Contingent Cassandra Says:

    But isn’t there a danger of creating fans for neighboring state’s university sports team, and failing to renew the fan base for one’s own (at least among the college-educated, who do still tend to be wealthier than those who didn’t go to college)? Can’t risk that!

  4. Derek Says:

    History and English? You jest. General Studies is where it’s at.

  5. Dr_Doctorstein Says:

    Derek, as I hinted a couple posts back, where it’s at nowadays is Adventure Leadership, or Higher Education Administration and Leadership, or anything, apparently, containing the word “leadership.”

    The key is to work that word into the title of as many courses and programs as possible. Higher Education Administration? Pish. Higher Education and Leadership? Now we’re talking!

    So what you want is “General Studies and Leadership.” Or better yet: Leadership Studies.

    Mention “Underwater Basketweaving” and everyone laughs. But for a new program in Underwater Basketweaving Leadership I could probably get the provost’s approval *and* a $500,000 grant.

  6. Dr_Doctorstein Says:

    Holy crap–I should’ve googled first before making a joke about Leadership Studies.

    Turns out that Leadership Studies programs are actually offered all over the place, from the BA to the PhD. How could I have been so naive as to think differently?

  7. Alan Allport Says:

    That’s cos you never took Leadership Studies, that’s why.

  8. Derek Says:

    Yeah, don’t even get me started about “Leadership Studies.” Every time I make the following argument I can tell that my admin hates me a bit more every day: The way one becomes a leader is to succeed in a specific field and to rise and become a leader in that field. To graduate from college in “leadership Studies” will get you laughed off the map in any profession whatsoever. Lots of people are leaders in college. But then they start at ground zero, or perhaps ground middle given that a college degree certainly skips the queue in many worlds.

    dcat

  9. Jack/OH Says:

    What about something called “humanics”? Our local Podunk Tech had a president a while back who promoted “humanics”. Is this an old wine-new bottles thing, intellectual flavor du jour, something genuine that’s been forgotten, or what? (Serious question–I’m not baiting.)

  10. Derek Says:

    I haven’t the foggiest idea. You sure that Podunk tech isn’t actually on the cutting edge of making human robots? Is this, like, a Terminator thing? (Tell any locals named Sarah Connor to get the hell out of Podunk!)

    dcat

  11. Jack/OH Says:

    Derek: LOL:) I’ve done very cursory Web searches. I know the word exists. Yeah, it does sound like some cheesy word blend. The former prexy never elaborated.

    Human robots at our local Podunk Tech? Oh, I really don’t want to “go there” . . . no I don’t;)

  12. theprofessor Says:

    We have “leadership studies” under a slightly different name. It is aimed at people with a bunch of college credits that don’t add up to anything in terms of a major so that they can finish their degrees. The content is on the light side, needless to say.

  13. charlie Says:

    Hell, my alma mater has Leadership Studies, offers an Ed. no less….

    http://www.usfca.edu/education/programs/doctoral

    Without this here thread, I wouldn’t have searched to see if they had that major. I don’t know whether I should thank y’all or just cry myself to sleep….

  14. Derek Says:

    I think you could thank us for your tears. Believe me, I may need to borrow a handkerchief myself.

    dcat

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