Here’s what you need to understand. Bouncing Baby Boy universities – like the University of North Carolina – want to watch their football/basketball games, want to use their jumbo building blocks to make new stadiums and arenas, want to pay their superhero ADs and coaches tens of millions of dollars AND WANT ABOVE ALL TO BE LEFT ALONE. That’s why UNC is as one coming down like a ton of legos on the president of the University of Maryland for having told UD’s hubby, Mr UD, at a UMD faculty senate meeting, that UNC deserves the death penalty. BOO. WAHWAH. BAD MAN. HURT THE BAD MAN.

NO ONE gets to interrupt the boys’ concentration on their games, their construction projects, and their dispensing of money to themselves and their friends; and certainly not no-count absurdities like university presidents… or, even worse, trustees.

As in – the U of Smell, known once as the U of L, and more formally as the University of Louisville, just had a major trustee eruption in the figure of pizza billionaire John Schnatter.

His outburst has of course been totally ignored by the university – BAD MAN. HURT THE BAD MAN. – but not by the media, which, ever since U of L’s athletics program turned out to be running a whorehouse for the players – a whormitory, as the place has been dubbed – has been a media magnet. The whormitory is after all only the latest sex and/or money sleaze coming out of that sleaziest of American universities, and it’s the kind of car wreck you just can’t look away from.


Schnatter’s problem is that, rather than join the boys and keep playing games and building sports arenas and giving millions of dollars to coaches until the whole university collapses under the weight of debt and derision, he wants to try to fix things. He thinks there may be something wrong with the university. Athletics, he announced at a recent public meeting of the trustees, is “sucking the life blood out of this place.” He claimed that the athletics leadership won’t even speak to trustees, that it operates in a silent arrogant world of its own.

Here’s what AD Tom Jurich – er, I mean some spokesperson – said in response.

“Tom (Jurich) does not have any comment on what was said.”

I am not going to dignify your outrageous comments about my non-responsiveness with a response.

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3 Responses to “The U of Smell Enters Hell”

  1. JND Says:

    Ha! He’ll be off the board soon enough.

  2. theprofessor Says:

    I like “whormitory.”

    If you think about it, shouldn’t budding professionals be serviced by professionals?

  3. Jack/OH Says:

    Y’know, when even the pizza dude gets it . . . .

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