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Monday, May 09, 2005
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DUSTUPS, BORING AND BODACIOUS First, two boring dustups while I was at the beach this weekend, one blogoscopic and the other academic. I shall put these two to sleep rapidly in order to get to the two stories that really interest me -- the rap sheet of the runaway bride, and the lovechildren of Albert, ruler of Monaco. Via Scribbling Woman, there’s the blogosphere’s Pol Pot Moment, in which a blogger announces the following: ' If I had a wish right now, I would wish one thing: that we remove all of our blogrolls and take down the EcoSystem and the Technorati 100 and all of the other ‘popularity’ lists. That whatever links exist, are honest ones based on what has been written, posted, published, not some static membership in a list that is, all too often, stale and out of date, and used as a weapon or a plea. ' I guess in any human enterprise that takes on significant proportions there’s eventually such a moment, when someone’s impatience with the scheme of things gets the better of them and they decree that we must wipe it all out, start afresh, brave new world, let it go, let it all go! Hokay. The second thingie is Jonathan Dresner’s having been deeply offended (an offense shared by other aggrieved professor-bloggers) by David Brooks, for his having said that the hapless Democrats these days are like "'alienated junior professors. No productive ideas. No sense of leadership. Just half-truths from the peanut gallery.' I've already sent my letter of protest to the Times," announces Dresner, "on behalf of junior faculty everywhere.” Bejaysus. Your letter to the Times on behalf of junior faculty everywhere? Although UD is no longer junior faculty, she’s sure as hell still alienated, and she’d like to register her grievance, on behalf of alienated faculty - junior or whatever - everywhere against anyone who would seek to undermine that alienation. If UD weren’t alienated from America she’d never get anything done (look for her chapter in the forthcoming MLA book, Approaches to Teaching Don DeLillo’s White Noise, about how everyone who is anyone is alienated from America), and she’d lose all respect for herself besides. As for the “no productive ideas” or “sense of leadership” but just “half-truths” -- do you really think it’s worth rising to this one? Go after Brooks because you hate high-level conservatives who write wittily and well, by all means -- but don’t pussyfoot. It makes all of us look ridiculous. On to more weighty matters - Albert’s ever-increasing lovechildren, and the Kerri Dunn (type her name into the Search feature up there for background) of the non-alienated world. Yes, the runaway bride, like Kerri, turns out to Have a Past. ' ATLANTA- Court records reportedly show that runaway bride Jennifer Wilbanks served jail time for shoplifting several years ago. The Atlanta Journal-Constitution is reporting Wilbanks faced a felony charge back in 1996 for allegedly shoplifting $1,700 worth of merchandise from a mall. Records show the prosecutor in that case dropped the charge after Wilbanks completed a program of community service and restitution. That prosecutor is now serving as Wilbanks' attorney. In a separate case, court records show Wilbanks served two weekends in jail after pleading guilty to another shoplifting charge. A judge sentenced her to probation, a $400 fine, and community service. The 32-year-old woman touched off an extensive search last month when she vanished from her Georgia home days before her wedding. The local district attorney is deciding whether to charge her with making false statements. ' Why does a person become an English professor? UD is often asked. Because real-life turns out to be a novel. So reading a lot of novels is actually a very good way to gear up for real life. Finally, the rate of illegitimate-heirs-to-the-throne-proliferation here is astounding, even by Grimaldi standards. UD is loving it. |