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Thursday, July 28, 2005
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NOT BAD. Excerpts from a few winners of this year’s bad fiction contest, sponsored by San Jose State University. “As he stared at her ample bosom, he daydreamed of the dual Stromberg carburetors in his vintage Triumph Spitfire, highly functional yet pleasingly formed, perched prominently on top of the intake manifold, aching for experienced hands, the small knurled caps of the oil dampeners begging to be inspected and adjusted as described in chapter seven of the shop manual." “India hangs like a wet washcloth from the towel rack of Asia.” "The crushed body of the sports car had turned her into a creature of free and perverse sexuality, releasing within its twisted bulkheads and leaking engine coolant all the deviant possibilities of her sex." [Oh. That third one's not really a winner. It's from the much-praised novel, Crash, by J.G. Ballard. Sorry.] *************************** UPDATE: UD's blogpal, Sherman Dorn, submitted a very good bad entry, and university-themed at that: "Leaning backwards over the balcony after three glasses of Merlot, the dean suddenly found himself dropping into the courtyard like a delinquent duck shot by a vigilante Supreme Court justice, landing squarely on students about to be honored for making the Provost's List and finally realizing his public ambition of impacting college students in a lifelong way." |