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Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Classic Exchange on
University Sports


These exchanges are happening all the time, and all the time both sides make precisely the same moves. The side that wants hundreds of millions of dollars spent on stadiums and practice fields always comes out with the same woeful bullshit. The other side always makes the same obvious point.

If you need reminding, here's some stuff from a recent pro/con, at the University of Alaska in Anchorage.



Miss Pro's upset because the governor vetoed a new sports complex. Athletics could be a "shining example" (of what?) for their community; and, speaking of community, how can you have one when the university is forced to hold some athletic events off-campus?


[Such things cause a] disconnect between students and athletics. These are UAA events that are not taking place on the UAA campus. They take place miles away, in a setting that is not conducive to creating true UAA pride...


Connectedness and pride are delicate, complex things; you can't expect to conduce them when students have to travel a few miles from campus to experience them... Miss P also insists that fancy athletic digs will keep Alaska students in-state. She forgets that there are quite a few reasons for getting your ass out of the tundra.

Pro comes in for the kill in her next to last paragraph:

Coming from the governor that appointed a hockey coach to the UAA board of regents, spearheaded the efforts to build the Wasilla Sports Complex and even named her own son Track, it seems strange that her administration would have vetoed UAA's future athletic facility.


Appointments to the regents? Sure you want to go there? The hockey coach can only remind your readers of other misconceived appointments to regencies in Alaska, like the amazing Reverend Jim Hayes... And naming her kid Track? Everything here depends on whether she named him Track because of her outsize track and field enthusiasm, or if there was in fact another reason... And even if his name is about track and field enthusiasm, it doesn't necessarily follow that she'll fund every track in the state... I named my kid Anna Livia after the character in Finnegans Wake, but I don't buy every copy of the book I see...



While Pro's stuff is all about intangibles like pride and shiningness, Con just talks numbers. The thing'll run about one hundred million, and meanwhile there's a billion dollars in deferred maintenance. Then, you know, there's still other stuff you might do with the money, like expand classes and make things more affordable for students... not to mention the walkways:

Parking lots and sidewalks are covered in ice and snow in below-freezing temperatures for the bulk of both semesters, but even the new ISB includes a long walk to the main entrance from any parking space.


Plus the university is shittily run:

In the end, UAA doesn't need a government grant as much as it needs a trimmed-down bureaucracy and better money-management skills.


I'm sure this sort of dissing is not conducive to creating true UAA pride, but it has the great merit of being true.