Leavin’ on that Midnight Train to …

… საქართველო.


Russia proved too much for the man (too much for the man, he couldn’t take it)
So he’s leaving a life he’s come to know, ooh (he said he’s going)
He said he’s going off to find (going off to find)
Ooh, ooh, ooh, what’s left of the world
The world of the sane he knew not long ago

He’s leaving (leaving)
On that midnight train to Georgia, yeah (leaving on the midnight train)
Said he’s going off (going off to find)
To a simpler place and time, oh yes, he is (whenever he takes that ride)
(Guess who’s gonna be right by his side?)

And I’ll be with him (I know you will)
On that midnight train to Georgia (leaving on a midnight train to Georgia, woo, woo)
He’d rather live in that world (live in that world)
Than live with Putin in ours (his world is nuts, his and his alone)

On abortion, Republican candidates are…

killing it!

But they haven’t yet tracked down the pic of him wearing his Reichsführer-SS uniform…

… so Doug Mastriano is fine. He’s fine.

And lo they smote all the books that were therein, including, uh, THIS one.

Once you start challenging library books, the firmament’s the limit. Provincial Keller TX has gotten TWO challenges of THE BIBLE, baby! Datz right. You don’t like Gender Queer; someone else happens not to like The Good Book. Hah! Both books get pulled. Plus purty much everything else in the library, I’d warrant. Eventually it’ll all go, and the state of utter ignorance the good folk of Keller seem to want for their kids will win the day. Good on ya, Keller.

Well, he faked being smart to get into Harvard.

Navarro says something mean about Kushner.

The State of Georgia has also Announced that it will Subsidize the Purchase Price of All CDs Played on One’s Belly to Make the Fetus Smarter; But the Subsidy Only Applies to …

Classical music, gentle sounds like lullabies, [and] nice melodies that inspire happiness.

As per UNICEF.

Georgia legislators have drawn up a list of not-nice melodies, all of which will be ineligible for the subsidy:

  1. Anything by Mahler
  2. Any version of Dies Irae or Stabat Mater
  3. The theme to the Addams Family tv show
  4. They’re Coming to Take Me Away

The Fetal Music subsidy is in addition to the fetus income tax dependent exemption.

‘Mr. Mastriano appeared to make his Gab account private and then took it down completely.’

Capturing the anti-semite/Christian nationalist vote is always a little tricky. Digitally enlarging your Jewish opponent’s nose on attack ads sounds smart, but may backfire. If only anti-semites notice it, fine; if everyone notices it, then Georgia gets a Senator with the… peculiar name of Ossoff, rather than the all-American, snub-nose, Perdue.

If you’re only running to represent some loser district most of whose voters are Thomas Sutpen before he made all his money — piece of cake. But if you’re talking the whole state, you may run into problems.

I mean, in the case at hand, Doug Mastriano’s gubernatorial race in Pennsylvania, Doug’s heartfelt religious bigotry has long found natural outlet on Mad Dog Andrew Torba’s Gab, the social media site that fascist pigs really dig; and now that Doug’s running for office, what could be more natural than taking it one step further, and hiring Torba for campaign advice? Martin Bormann to Doug’s Hitler kind of thing.

But oh no. Cancel culture strikes again, and Doug has had to end a long and meaningful relationship with Torba/Gab.


Update: UD thanks Jeff for correcting her earlier Senator/Governor mix-up.

“… [And] a swimming lane for commuters.”

Did a double-take on that phrase.

Iranian Women’s Refusal to Give Head Destroying the Country.

[A] spokesperson of Iran’s Armed Forces said people with “improper hijab” especially celebrities and those in the movie industry who do not observe the regime’s mandatory hijab laws were “Satan’s army”. 

Speaking at a hijab festival, Abolfazl Shekarchi said that those he deems as “improperly veiled” were “brazenly waging war against the Quran.”

The military official’s used the term “moharebeh” or waging war against God for those who do not observe the regime’s hijab laws even while according to Islamic jurisprudence moharebeh is defined as “the use of a weapon against people to scare them” and according to Article 282 of Iran’s Islamic Penal Code, the punishment for moharebeh is “execution, crucifixion, cutting off the right hand and left foot, and exile.”

… He also claimed that Iranians’ non-observance of the mandatory hijab has caused an “increase in divorce, an increase in tension in families, an increase in mental illnesses and depression and lack of security in society and has also dealt a heavy blow to the country’s manufacturing industry and economy.”

… Reza Akrami, a member of the Central Council of the Combatant Clergy Association, said on Tuesday that “if a woman exposes herself on the street, no driver or pedestrian can control his eyes, and this will lead to an accident.”

“You cover anything expensive. Are gold shops like fruit shops? They sell jewelry from under glass instead of offering it without any cover like bananas and grapes,” he said.

Javad Hosseini Kia, the representative of the western city of Kermanshah in the parliament, said that “the structure of a man is different from that of a woman.”

“Have you ever seen someone put a crow in a cage and take it home? No. But you see many nightingales and lovebirds (in cages),” he said.

Now it DO be true that some folks say Mississippi is America’s worst state for women. By a long shot.

Even so, it don’t seem fair that respectable publications like Newsweek run articles sayin we gonna run our bloodhounds up down and all ’round the coochees of … certain people as they attempt to exit the state at transportation hubs. This scurrilous claim has been fact checked and is not true.

Let’s set things straight: The real story is that the state has set up a so-called WAND SQUAD composed of legislators, stationed at airports and train stations, who will be empowered to insert transducers into certain people. But never fear! They will definitely be using probe gel.

As the Fourth Approaches, UD Pens a Patriotic Song.
Sing it.

O Bezumbia! the gem of the river,
The yacht of the richest in the world, 
Your size makes the whole planet quiver,
Before you our bridges all unfurl.

 Yes before you our bridges disassemble.
Five hundred million spent on only you!
Thy selfishness makes decent people tremble,
Three cheers for the red, white, and blue.

Your yacht wing'd its wide ostentation,
And threaten'd our bridges to deform,
An icon of super-greed's creation,
Bezumbia sails its vileness thro' the storm.
‘A number of national Republicans publicly expressed reservations about [Eric] Greitens’s candidacy, even before Monday’s [Kill RINOs] ad. Sens. Josh Hawley (R-MO) and Joni Ernst (R-IA) had even called for him to drop out given the family abuse allegations against him. The ad may have been an attempt to deflect some of that criticism.’

Well hell’s bells I’ve heard of “deflection” before, but not deflection that involves deflecting attention from your abuse of your family and toward your murder of political opponents. But whatever.

Greitens’ Final Campaign Ad Rivets and Horrifies the Nation

Declaring himself “humiliated” by the national and international disgust he has evoked by releasing an ad depicting him killing Republicans insufficiently supportive of Donald Trump, Missouri Senate candidate Eric Greitens has released a new, final ad.

Speaking directly to the camera and wearing ritual seppuku garb, Greitens announces that because he has inadvertently brought dishonor to Trump there is nothing left but for him to disembowel himself.

“To make absolutely sure that my sacrifice succeeds,” Greitens says in a steely voice, “I have also employed a henchman to decapitate me.”

The ad was immediately taken down by all social media outlets, but can be accessed on his website. (Click on the link titled A FAREWELL.)

Here it is.

Florence Foster Jenkins at Cal State Long Beach

How far can the rich and talentless go to stage their own art? Recall legendary, tone deaf Florence Foster Jenkins, who paid to fill up concert venues for her hapless performances.

And now consider Carolyn Campagna Kleefeld, benefactor of CSULB’s Kleefeld Museum, and its Kleefeld Gallery, and – most recently – the Kleefeld Exhibit in the Kleefeld Gallery at the Kleefeld Museum. The LA Times art critic, having paid a visit to her show, does not hold back. Why is a public university featuring the worthless montages of its moneybags?

[T]he art is frankly terrible — by far the worst I’ve seen on display in a serious exhibition venue, public or private, for profit or nonprofit, in years… A CSULB professor, who spoke on condition of anonymity given the sensitivity of the matter, said of the exhibition, “If that was a student applicant’s portfolio, they wouldn’t get admitted to the program.” … A gift deal that includes permanent maintenance of a big collection and an archive of the donor’s bad art, plus a gallery dedicated to its display, all in exchange for millions of dollars, makes it impossible not to think “pay to play.” … A permanent chunk of a public university’s tax-subsidized museum facility and artistic program has been effectively privatized to advance the personal interests of a wealthy patron.

Ahem. What now? As Lenin asked: What is to be done?

Oh, I think we can anticipate an entire tarring and feathering for the snobby sexist judgmental LA Times critic. We can anticipate some slave-scribe at the school writing an angry point by point rebuttal of this haughty disdainful pig whose blatant envy of a person who can actually create art poisons his pen. How dare he call this painting bad art?

“Call Tiffany Misty and Whitney for more information about The Duets.”

UD is agog at the names of the real estate agents representing a new beach resort community. Tiffany, Misty, and Whitney? Did the development hire on a first-name only basis?

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