This blog has upchucked again and again over the supernauseating corruption of world soccer — a degree of vomitivity that leaves our own local football/basketball bad boys looking bush league. Soccer’s got the whole world in its hands, and even my big fat rich country can’t compete with that.

‘Soccer is the world’s game, and the world is a corrupt place. All this corruption only makes international soccer a better representation of the world we live in.’

You have to go back to Schopenhauer’s Die Welt als Wille und Money Laundering to get to the metaphysical core of global soccer corruption; but if you don’t want to read that deeply, just scan the Argentine Football Association.

Today, it’s ranked #198. Search this blog for TEXAS TECH to find out all the reasons why.

TTU’s slogan:

WE’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN BRENDAN SORSBY!

My bad. In an earlier post, I described veteran game-gambler Brendan Sorsby as on his way to the ethics-free NFL, having been evacuated from the cloaca of college football.

Now it turns out that even the NFL won’t take a guy who bets on his own games!

This puts the ball back in Texas Tech’s court. They love him there, and did everything they could to clear him to play; but eventually the contempt and disgust of the world forced them to give him up.

Anyway, they figured the NFL would take him.. But hey it didn’t, see, so this is TTU’s big chance to draw their sweet babe back into their arms and make him theirs again… God knows a guy like Sorsby is made for that school and that school alone…

Oh come now. College football stinks to high heaven, and the effort of Texas Tech to retain a filthy quarterback (“Somebody’s gambling on a sport they’re playing. You don’t think something’s wrong with that?”) is merely the latest defining stinkbomb.

The school, and the state’s poster boy for purulence, Ken Paxton, have withdrawn their lawsuits, while the QB himself has gone to a better, ethics-free place (the NFL). All is well, and schools like Texas Tech may proceed to their next shit-clogged hero.

We’ve followed slutty perverted Texas Tech for long years at UD, and nothing that comes out of that school’s superwide reeking asshole surprises us here.

Other people pretend surprise that their quarterback is a moral degenerate; but really? It’s Texas. It’s Texas Tech.

The University of North Carolina football program is always in the top five most violently disgusting in the nation. Has been for decades. Will always be. Feast your eyes.

So it’s so … cute … to see a professor there clutch his pearls and complain that the lads hit excessive speeds in their massive SUVs and even park illegally!

Y’all know (if you know UD) how much she loves this kind of writing, with exfiltrated AIM forming ominous messages; and you know she reliably found it in university sports writing.

In the old days, she read gobs of this stuff, and was sure to share it with you; but now, though the sports biz is – uh – starker than ever, her gaze has wandered away from violent coaches, criminalized teams, empty stadiums etc etc.

Still, if the toothpaste is so stark that no one can look away (see Rutgers and WSU), she will read and report about the writing on the wall. Shockingly, because I was sure as shootin’ it was just a few bad apples, approximately “75% of male college students bet on sports and more than 25% .. are athletes.” And then there’s the coaches. Legal/NCAA compliance among our gridiron and b-ball court guys looks kind of like this.

The long day’s journey into court that is Rutgers – a bastion of filth and corruption (read the sports posts I just linked to) even by Jersey standards – moves appreciably closer to an actual court date. To revisit my Rutgers athletics posts over many years is to marvel again at the special brew of shiftless greedy presidents, vile and violent coaches, criminal gang team players, invisible and indifferent fans, etc etc, that has made Rutgers what it is today.

When removing student fees ($138.1M), university support ($146.2M) and state funding ($42.1M) from the revenue total, Rutgers’ deficit since joining the Big Ten surpasses $516 million, marking the biggest in the league by a significant margin.

Most Big Ten schools rely on some form of subsidy, NJ.com analysis shows, but none come close to Rutgers. In the past four years, the New Jersey school took in the most combined state support, direct-university support and student-fee revenue ($109.6M) by a wide margin.

Some American universities are, because of economic/demographic changes, in a state of near-existential crisis. It’s adorably retro to watch Rutgers kill itself for the oldest reason – football/spectacular greed.

… shows us yet again why basketball coaches are so highly compensated (G’town’s prez only makes one mill): They are GREAT ambassadors for the school, especially to the youngest among us.

Watch for him to be rewarded with a million dollar raise next year.

How do you even reckon that up? What do you do with all the other dirtiest programs in college football?

SING IT

Tickets have a five-fold rise
Fans must pay a rip-off price
Too ra loo ra loo
Pat a pat a pan
When I pay my FIFA sum
How can anyone be glum

At this late date it isn’t about the ancient layers of moral filth in the soil of bigtime college football; even UD, who giveth not a fuck about collegiate sports, can recite the (highly selective) history of ick Mitch Albom reviews here — all of his nostalgia prompted by U Mich’s latest coaching scandal.

Its six million dollar a year coach got to be coach when the coach before him was suspended for recruitment violations (the new coach – duh – was also guilty of recruitment violations) but hey that doesn’t even count in any university sports reckoning, does it? Business as usual. Sex shit, however, plus assault, plus the guy who earns five million more than the school president is as we speak in jail… They’ve dumped the dude for cause but he’ll sue anyway and end up costing UM many millions. Life of the mind.

Pennsylvania State University [will close] seven campuses due to financial constraints, while Louisiana State University [has] implemented a hiring freeze and other cost-cutting measures.

[B]oth institutions [recently] fired their head football coaches. Penn State [paid] more than $45 million to make head coach James Franklin go away … LSU fired Brian Kelly [and] gave him a buyout of $54 million.

Concerned parents are speaking out after more than a dozen fights broke out during the Parker vs. Ramsay football game at Legion Field, an event meant to celebrate non-violence.

****************

Hey but no one fired a gun. In Birmingham Alabama, that counts as non-violence.

Yes, wotta shocker. Football violence? Now I’ve seen everything.