$102 million. You read that right. How pleasing.

UNC’s football manager is “the highest-paid general manager in the sport at $1.5 million.” The money went right down the drain from the beginning: the team has been quite shitty. But now he’s not even working for his salary – somebody complained to HR about him and he’s been suspended while they discover whatever… An affair with a teenage staffer. Recruiting violations up the wazoo. Harassment. Fucking with a player’s professors to get him out of schoolwork — a proud UNC tradition. Could be any number of things.

Meanwhile no one remembers that the loser ten million dollar a year coach and the loser million dollar manager (the manager who’s about to add a scandal to a pathetic win/loss record) have something somewhere to do with a university.

That’s an official statement from a university vice-chancellor – and not just any university, but scandal-plagued UNC Chapel Hill, which has every reason to show that it’s a university and not a filthy sports factory. But when your highest representatives can’t write the English language…AND HE’S VC FOR COMMUNICATIONS.

As for the latest sickening sports scandal at that benighted school — as the illiterate VC seems to be trying to say, they ain’t talking. It involves the football team’s general manager, however, so here’s hoping it’s real real yummy.

Cuz he’s been a bad boy … It’s not just his betting on games; he’s also apparently way into guns and drugs and shit.

He’s in lotsa legal trouble but until he – what? – murders somebody? – he’ll stay on the team in good standing, a giant of the gridiron, our hero.

This blog has upchucked again and again over the supernauseating corruption of world soccer — a degree of vomitivity that leaves our own local football/basketball bad boys looking bush league. Soccer’s got the whole world in its hands, and even my big fat rich country can’t compete with that.

‘Soccer is the world’s game, and the world is a corrupt place. All this corruption only makes international soccer a better representation of the world we live in.’

You have to go back to Schopenhauer’s Die Welt als Wille und Money Laundering to get to the metaphysical core of global soccer corruption; but if you don’t want to read that deeply, just scan the Argentine Football Association.

Today, it’s ranked #198. Search this blog for TEXAS TECH to find out all the reasons why.

TTU’s slogan:

WE’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN BRENDAN SORSBY!

My bad. In an earlier post, I described veteran game-gambler Brendan Sorsby as on his way to the ethics-free NFL, having been evacuated from the cloaca of college football.

Now it turns out that even the NFL won’t take a guy who bets on his own games!

This puts the ball back in Texas Tech’s court. They love him there, and did everything they could to clear him to play; but eventually the contempt and disgust of the world forced them to give him up.

Anyway, they figured the NFL would take him.. But hey it didn’t, see, so this is TTU’s big chance to draw their sweet babe back into their arms and make him theirs again… God knows a guy like Sorsby is made for that school and that school alone…

Oh come now. College football stinks to high heaven, and the effort of Texas Tech to retain a filthy quarterback (“Somebody’s gambling on a sport they’re playing. You don’t think something’s wrong with that?”) is merely the latest defining stinkbomb.

The school, and the state’s poster boy for purulence, Ken Paxton, have withdrawn their lawsuits, while the QB himself has gone to a better, ethics-free place (the NFL). All is well, and schools like Texas Tech may proceed to their next shit-clogged hero.

We’ve followed slutty perverted Texas Tech for long years at UD, and nothing that comes out of that school’s superwide reeking asshole surprises us here.

Other people pretend surprise that their quarterback is a moral degenerate; but really? It’s Texas. It’s Texas Tech.

The University of North Carolina football program is always in the top five most violently disgusting in the nation. Has been for decades. Will always be. Feast your eyes.

So it’s so … cute … to see a professor there clutch his pearls and complain that the lads hit excessive speeds in their massive SUVs and even park illegally!

Y’all know (if you know UD) how much she loves this kind of writing, with exfiltrated AIM forming ominous messages; and you know she reliably found it in university sports writing.

In the old days, she read gobs of this stuff, and was sure to share it with you; but now, though the sports biz is – uh – starker than ever, her gaze has wandered away from violent coaches, criminalized teams, empty stadiums etc etc.

Still, if the toothpaste is so stark that no one can look away (see Rutgers and WSU), she will read and report about the writing on the wall. Shockingly, because I was sure as shootin’ it was just a few bad apples, approximately “75% of male college students bet on sports and more than 25% .. are athletes.” And then there’s the coaches. Legal/NCAA compliance among our gridiron and b-ball court guys looks kind of like this.

The long day’s journey into court that is Rutgers – a bastion of filth and corruption (read the sports posts I just linked to) even by Jersey standards – moves appreciably closer to an actual court date. To revisit my Rutgers athletics posts over many years is to marvel again at the special brew of shiftless greedy presidents, vile and violent coaches, criminal gang team players, invisible and indifferent fans, etc etc, that has made Rutgers what it is today.

When removing student fees ($138.1M), university support ($146.2M) and state funding ($42.1M) from the revenue total, Rutgers’ deficit since joining the Big Ten surpasses $516 million, marking the biggest in the league by a significant margin.

Most Big Ten schools rely on some form of subsidy, NJ.com analysis shows, but none come close to Rutgers. In the past four years, the New Jersey school took in the most combined state support, direct-university support and student-fee revenue ($109.6M) by a wide margin.

Some American universities are, because of economic/demographic changes, in a state of near-existential crisis. It’s adorably retro to watch Rutgers kill itself for the oldest reason – football/spectacular greed.

… shows us yet again why basketball coaches are so highly compensated (G’town’s prez only makes one mill): They are GREAT ambassadors for the school, especially to the youngest among us.

Watch for him to be rewarded with a million dollar raise next year.

How do you even reckon that up? What do you do with all the other dirtiest programs in college football?

SING IT

Tickets have a five-fold rise
Fans must pay a rip-off price
Too ra loo ra loo
Pat a pat a pan
When I pay my FIFA sum
How can anyone be glum