December 5th, 2023
Alabama Asshole Aborts Asinine Agenda.

What a piece of shit.

November 19th, 2023
‘On March 8, 2023, [Senator Markwayne] Mullin accused Teamsters president Sean O’Brien of “intimidation” during a Senate HELP Committee hearing on the PRO Act, claiming that O’Brien was forcing union members to pay dues and alleging that union leaders had attempted to unionize his plumbing business. When Mullin asked about O’Brien’s salary and compared it to what he claimed UPS drivers made, on average, in 2019, O’Brien responded, “that’s inaccurate”, and told Mullin he simply “negotiates the contract”. O’Brien then said that Mullin’s questioning was “out of line”, to which Mullin responded, “shut your mouth”.’

“But open your nose!”

November 14th, 2023
UD is far too high-born to know squat…

… about squat — Carolina Squat, that is — but she seems to have covered the story on her blog back in Sept 2021, so let’s keep going.

South Carolina is banning the “Carolina Squat,” which is when people raise the front of their trucks and SUVs several inches higher than the rear end. The ban comes after legislation was introduced months ago, but drivers will now receive warnings through the next 180 days. After that time, South Carolina police will be issuing fines and suspending driver’s licenses.

North Carolina done already done it; now the Low Country (famous for the Murdaugh clan) will also have to go lower.

UD is quite taken by Jalopnik’s defense of La Squat:

[M]any people seem to hate the Carolina Squat solely because of the way it looks. Check out all the bigoted comments on the petition that aims to outlaw the vehicle modification… I think it’s safe to say that few folks see a jacked up car and say: “I’m really concerned that that driver may not be able to see over the hood.” No, the criticism is usually one of simple disgust, and while I can’t assert with confidence that socioeconomic prejudices are at play with the general sentiments towards Carolina Squat trucks, I will say that anytime we notice scores of people hating something immediately upon learning about it or seeing it, we should all take a step back and try to improve our understanding… I’m just always a bit concerned when I see vitriol directed towards any misunderstood car subculture…

November 7th, 2023

Voters in Derby, Conn., decisively rejected the Republican nominee for mayor, Gino DiGiovanni Jr., who was charged with trespassing at the U.S. Capitol on Jan. 6. DiGiovanni placed third behind Joe DiMartino, the Democratic mayor-elect, and Richard Dziekan, the Republican incumbent who was running as an unaffiliated candidate…

November 4th, 2023
“I do not believe that Tommy Tuberville is a racist at all,” one [Alabama Republican politician said], speaking anonymously. “I really believe that maybe he doesn’t have an understanding of the English language.”

A whole new level.

September 6th, 2023
Chutzpah Amazes UD. Chutzpah Amuses UD.

There was the debraining community of Antwerp – ultraorthodox Jews pissed that the government was refusing to let them debrain their children:

The parents argued that the restrictions [the government was placing on their refusal to educate their children in basic literacy] limit their freedom to educate their children according to their beliefs and asked the court to fine the government $6,780 per child for every day the limitations are in place…

Datz right! YOU give US thousands of dollars per child per day for as long as YOU refuse to let US debrain our children!

UD loved that.

Unfortunately, and to the shock of millions, the court “strongly” rejected this demand. But I mean what the hell go for it! The worst they can say is no!


So UD also loved this, from one of the bad boys of Jan 6.

In one set of court filings, [Eric] Bochene unsuccessfully asked the court to pay him $75,000 an hour in fees for his legal services in his own case. 

Again, what the hell! Give it a whirl!


Here’s a quick Jan 6 bad boy sketch that includes chutzpah, bad luck, mental retardation, and I don’t know what else. If you can read this flash fiction without laughing, you’re a better man than I am.

Marc Bru of Vancouver, Washington, failed to appear for a June 30 hearing in his case, but allegedly continued to post social media messages about the prosecution and the federal search for his whereabouts, as agents sought to track him down.

Justice Department prosecutors said, during the search for Bru, Bru shared tweets about his case that said, “I’m drawing a f*** line in the sand” “I’d rather die than submit to f*** tyrants.” Nearly a month later, authorities found Bru in Montana.

A Justice Department court filing said “the defendant encountered Montana state police officers after he was involved in a car accident in which he states he accidentally drove into a ditch and was then hit by a drunk driver. The defendant informed the responding Montana state police officers that he did not have a valid license or car insurance, and that he had a federal warrant out for his arrest. The officers arrested the defendant, confirmed the existence of the federal arrest warrant, notified the U.S. Marshals Service.”

Bru was charged with obstruction and entering a restricted building two months after the January 6th attack. Bru had opted to represent himself in his case, before allegedly absconding.  

Defendants who fail to show in court and run from authorities risk facing stiffer or additional charges.

May 19th, 2023
‘Turns out, bigoted policies have consequences. That’s 2,000+ jobs that will be welcomed back with open arms to the Golden State.’

California’s governor notes Disney’s cancellation of a one billion dollar, 2,000 job Florida project.

It’s all part of Ron DeSantis’ Don’t Say ‘Stay’ policy. Good on ya, Ron, for being too arrogant to deal with Disney like an adult.

April 15th, 2023
Cutting Off Your Prose to Feed Your Base


February 16th, 2023
Pity Berea.

Kentucky is one of our stupidest states, a fact reflected in its long list of terrible colleges and universities. I don’t know what this blog would do without the astonishingly, enduringly, scandalous University of Louisville; but UK and a bunch of other schools with “Kentucky” in their name are also real scum buckets. As a blogger dedicated to writing about what’s worst (and sometimes of course best) about American universities, let UD take this opportunity to say to that state THANK YOU. I believe the applicable cliche is The Gift that Keeps on Giving.

And now that Kentucky makes its benightedness official by banning abortion under all circumstances, it’s time for non-demented women to make it official and strike the entire state off their college-choice list.

Amid the sewage, though, there’s Berea, a deeply inspiring, profoundly impressive institution marooned in the swamp. As the state of Kentucky joins Mississippi and Alabama at the bottom of all quality of life lists, one hopes there’s some way to keep Berea afloat.

August 29th, 2022
Rub a dub dub, one man in a flub.

It takes a heap o’ scrubbin’ to make Blake Masters’ website less mad. In the good old days, it was “We’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad,” and you could put your insane shit right down there on your campaign’s GET TO KNOW BLAKE page; but now that your whackjob thing about NEIN NEIN NEIN NIEMALS KEINE ABORTION and GEORGE SOROS STOLE THE ELECTION doesn’t seem to be working for you vote-wise, it’s time to press DELETE, BACKSPACE, ESC. and anything else that will allow your webmaster to pretend you’re a humane and rational person rather than the caterwauling shit-for-brains you actually are. Good luck with that.

July 12th, 2022
That Y’all and Shut Ma Mouth Land

Ezra Dyer, Car and Driver:

[North Carolina] House Bill 1049 … would allocate $50,000 to destroy free public car chargers.

We’ve simply got to do something about these free public chargers, even if it costs us $50,000! Those things cost tens of cents per hour, when they’re being used…

Critics of this bill might point out that increasing the number of electric cars could actually benefit owners of internal-combustion vehicles, thanks to reduced demand for petroleum products…

[Yes,] electric-car company VinFast is building a 2000-acre factory just up the road that will employ 7500 people, and Toyota is building a battery factory outside Greensboro that’ll employ 1750 people. But let’s remember that House Bill 1049 would also create a job — for the person who goes around and rips out the free public chargers …

May 12th, 2022
Pleading, and pre-trial release: A Guide.

[A Capitol rioter] was scheduled to plead guilty in D.C. federal court Wednesday to a misdemeanor of unlawful picketing or parading in the Capitol but when Judge Emmett Sullivan asked [him] why he wished to plead guilty, he blurted out: “I wanted to go to trial but the prosecutor said if I didn’t go to trial they would put a felony on me so I think this is probably the better route. I believe I’m innocent.”

Sullivan replied that he “can’t take a plea of guilty if you say you’re innocent.”

… As part of the conditions, [Anthime] Gionet must notify the court if he changes his home address but a pre-trial services officer told a judge in October that Gionet had left home in Arizona and moved to Clearwater, Florida without telling anyone.

Officers said they only found out when Gionet had a run-in with local law enforcement over someone apparently throwing cans at his house. Months earlier, his release conditions were tightened over a series of run-ins he had with Arizona police.

A judge declined to revoke his release. Then a month later, Gionet was charged with defacing a Hanukkah display at the Arizona state capitol.

He was also sentenced to 30 days in jail in January for assaulting a bouncer in Scottsdale, Arizona, in 2020 but is appealing it.

January 11th, 2022
There’ll Always be a ‘Bama

A second suit was filed by Representative Eric Swalwell, Democrat of California, against Mr. Trump, his son Donald Trump Jr., Mr. Giuliani and Representative Mo Brooks, Republican of Alabama, accusing them of inciting the mob violence…

Mr. Brooks, who wore body armor onstage at a rally preceding the violence as he told the crowd to “start taking down names and kicking ass,” represented himself at Monday’s hearing after the Justice Department declined to do so…

“This was not to inspire people to attack the Capitol,” he said of his speech.

October 13th, 2021
Awright awright. I was wrong.

I said here that Jon Gruden’s the stupidest person in the world. That was before I met Brandon Fellows, echt Trumpian.

April 28th, 2021
Oh how I’ve missed Andrew Giuliani.

There he is again after all these years, a big ol blowhard just like Pa, and it stirred such memories for UD! When, back in 2008, Duke University threw AG off the golf team cuz he’s no good at the game, he sued. He sued Duke for damages plus a promise that he could use Duke’s golf facilities whenever he wanted for the rest of his life, damn you.

In the lawsuit, he acknowledged that he may have misbehaved in February when he tossed an apple in a teammate’s face, flipped his putter a few feet, threw and broke a club and gunned his engine in a parking lot.

A bunch of other players went to the trouble of writing Andrew an email saying they preferred he not return to the team.

With this promising background, the suit was hilariously thrown out by a judge who alluded to Caddyshack among other popular entertainments.

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