Trump surrogate Mark Burns offers a long list of excuses to cover his long list of lies about himself.
Trump surrogate Mark Burns offers a long list of excuses to cover his long list of lies about himself.
TACOnic State Parkway.
The founder of Latinos for Trump on Thursday warned that if his candidate loses, America faces an uncertain future in which Mexican food is far too easily available.
“My culture is a dominant culture, and it’s imposing and it’s causing problems,” Marco Gutierrez said in an interview on MSNBC. “If you don’t do something about it, you’re gonna have taco trucks [on] every corner.”
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With several predominantly Latino neighborhoods, Phoenix is a city used to seeing taco trucks on the corner. In the wake of Gutierrez’s comments, Arizona Congressman Ruben Gallego decided to patronize one of them.
The Democrat posted a photo to his personal Twitter account of him ordering three carne asada tacos from his favorite taco truck for lunch Friday. The picture was accompanied by the tweet “about to assert my cultural dominance.” It has garnered hundreds of likes.
[George] Shultz [has signaled] that he [is] discussing issuing a joint endorsement of Hillary Clinton with Henry Kissinger.
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Trump’s campaign staff should get to work on their tweets asap, since there’s speculation the men might make the announcement on Labor Day.
One source for some great Kissinger tweets would be Christopher Hitchens’ book, The Trial of Henry Kissinger. Example:
[Americans] can either persist in averting their gaze from the egregious impunity enjoyed by a notorious war criminal and lawbreaker, or they can become seized by the exalted standards to which they continually hold everyone else.
Don’t say it’s from Hitchens, of course; I don’t think Hitchens would, uh, be supporting Trump.
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One danger of not citing the author, however, is that no one’s going to believe Trump knows the words egregious and impunity…
Actually, now that I look at the thing, the rather lengthy sentence, and the well-deployed either/or formulation, are also deal breakers… Let’s see…
Kissinger: War criminal! Lawbreaker! Sad!
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A second set of tweets could feature the advanced age of both men.
Kissinger! Shultz! Sharing a condo in Seizure World! Sad!
George and Henry sittin’ in a tree… IN SEIZURE WORLD. Sad!
There are many variants of these. You might mention Ronald Reagan. I leave it to the imagination of the Trump campaign.
Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus said Sunday that his party’s nominee knows that he must inject a little “humanity” into his rhetoric if he hopes to win the presidency…
“…Donald Trump understands that with every position that is taken and as you get closer to the White House, a degree of humanity and decency is part of every decision that needs to be made… [He] wants to do the right thing and wants to take every position that he’s talking about and pepper it with decency, dignity and humanity.”
In every race that must be run
There is an element of fun
You find the fun and snap!
The job’s a game
And every task you undertake
Becomes a piece of cake
A lark! A spree! It’s very clear to see that
A pinch of humanity helps the messaging go down
The messaging go down-wown
The messaging go down
A spoonful of decency helps the messaging go down
In a most delightful way!
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A cypher running to be prez
Cannot be bothered what he sez
While hurting people cuz he doesn’t care
But now his polls have got so bad
He’s had to add a tad, a crumb, a grain
To flavor his campaign — for…
A speck of humanity helps the messaging go down
The messaging do down-wown
The messaging go down
Just a hint of humanity helps the messaging down
In a most delightful way!
On a long and lonesome highway
East of Orono
You can listen to the gov’nor
Moanin’ out his tortured soul:
Don’t you say that I’m a racist
You cocksucking SOB.
No one’s done more for the black man
Than Donald Trump and me.
Don’t need no snot-nosed little runt sayin’ I’m a fool
Gonna blow your fuckin’ head off in a nice old-fashioned duel
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Here I am
On the phone again
There they are
Commie fags
Here I go
Fighting foes again
There I go
Paul Le Page
A Vanity Fair writer assesses various scenarios that could tip the presidential race in favor of Donald Trump. Number Five:
5. CLINTON TURNS OUT TO BE A HOLOGRAM OF ONCE-LIVING CLINTON, À LA TUPAC AT COACHELLA
Projected odds of occurrence: below 0.01%
Disruptive power: mediumClinton has not held any press conferences in a long time, and she normally seems programmed. But the odds of her being a hologram are still low, as she has repeatedly proven able to meet with donors this week. Also, it wouldn’t be a slam-dunk for Trump either way, because election law would come into play and Hillary’s hologram would have to be replaced by a flesh-and-blood candidate, something that might actually lower Trump’s chances.
So many full veiling bans have taken place – and will take place – in Europe that you can now discern at least one telling pattern in the process. Noise is made among political parties and leaders about introducing partial or full bans. IMMENSE numbers of opinion pieces appear in newspapers all over Europe, and in the United States, and in the Middle East. Almost all of these pieces oppose bans; the only difference among them involves the degree of anger and self-righteousness with which the author expresses her incredulity that anyone could fail to see the obvious degeneracy and threat to democracy such bans represent.
Next up are the national polls, which virtually always reveal that strong to overwhelming majorities in the country in question support a ban. Since taking seriously results like these is also a feature of democracy, and since disturbingly and very visually annihilated female minorities on your streets doesn’t, when you think about it, smack very powerfully of democracy at all, ban-opposers are in a bit of a fix. Always they write with the confidence that all decent-minded people perceive the evil of forcing women, via fines, not to be annihilated, and then it turns out that their confidence is badly misplaced.
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If they are honest, they ponder the disconnect between their sense of the world and what the world really is. Are virtually all of their fellow French citizens vile Islamophobes? Has everybody turned into Marine Le Pen? And what the hell happened to the goddamn European Court of Human Rights? The world’s gone mad!
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But it is now really the intellectual responsibility of people who defend a cultural status quo in which women are visually annihilated to examine with honesty and humility how it is that they came to be so out of step with the instinct of vast majorities in almost all of the European countries where the status of fully veiled women begins to become a matter of law.
Quite the flub.
Trump so far merely exhibits mental confusion; little by little, he’s letting us in on why – perhaps – he’s confused.
My Secret Vote
Once I had a secret vote.
It needed utmost privacy.
The fact that I’m a masochist
Should stay unknown to all but me.
So I tell a little lie
When pollsters ask me what I’ll do:
“Oh, I’d never vote for Trump.
The man just makes me want to spew.”
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I’d shout my secret from the highest hill!
Sadistic Donald Trump gives me a thrill!
But these words I cannot say
Until I’m in a booth on ballot day.
Clinton also provided insight into how she’s preparing to handle Donald Trump’s freewheeling, improvisational style in their upcoming general election debates.
“I am drawing on my experience in elementary school,” she said before imitating a boy pulling on a girl’s pigtails.
That time of year thou may’st in me behold
When orange hairs, or none, or few, do hang
Upon this brow which lately raged against the polls.
But now bare silent Tweets! where late my Twitter sang.
In me thou see’st the twilight of such day,
As after sunset fadeth in the west,
Which by-and-by black night doth take away,
Death’s second self, that seals up all in rest.
In me thou see’st the glowing of such ire
That on the ashes of my pride doth lie,
The reality-show whereon it must expire
Consumes that which it was nourish’d by.
This thou perceivest, which makes my spite more strong,
To love that well which I must leave ere long.
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This latest news allows me to update Trump administration appointments/personnel:
Chief Advisor, Women’s Issues: KENNETH STARR
Inaugural Poet: FREDERICK SEIDEL
Treasury: MARTIN SHKRELI
Fitness Czar: RYAN LOCHTE
Czarina: HOPE SOLO
Office of Ethics: ISHMAEL ZAMORA
Health and Welfare: MIKE LEACH
I ranted to the knave and fool,
I acted the obscenest tool,
To transform the polls.
Fit audience I found, but Clinton rules
The voter rolls.
I sought my betters: though in each
Fine manners, liberal speech,
Turn hatred into sport.
Nothing said or done can reach
My sadistic heart.
From a penthouse have I come.
Great pride, great rooms,
Maimed me at the start.
I carry to my bronzéd tomb
A sadistic heart.
Donald Trump’s doctor confuses the American College of Gastroenterologists with Trump University.
A lot of people are saying that this confusion on his part (coupled with multiple verbal anomalies in his letter about Donald Trump’s fitness for the presidency) suggests Dr. Bornstein has serious medical issues which could put into question his official endorsement of the candidate’s physical condition.