Now that the entirely random (all are called to cheat; few are chosen) Adzillatron of Fortune has swiveled its gigantic screen in the direction of Syracuse University, and now that the nation’s media is riveted to that school (you can’t buy this kind of publicity), it’s time for UD not only to remind you of her way-beyond-legendary column on the subject of professors and big-time sports; it’s also time to put in a word for the ladies.
The guys? Sure, sure, the guys. King Coach, the Coach God, with his massive salary and pep talks about character; the “Vice Chancellor and Athletics Director” (think I’m kidding? when you’re the absolute bottom of the barrel, you better believe you make your AD a chancellor); the president of the university, docile, kittenish BFF of his coachly master… We’ve seen this adorable bumbling crowd so many times…
But without the receptionist in the background of all this high-profile bonding, athletes would never be able to stay eligible. People forget that at schools like Chapel Hill and Syracuse, the entire elaborate system gets sacked and broken like Joe Theismann without those sweethearts over in the corner stamping AAAAAAA all day.