… playbook, the host mother of a fully-weaponized 18-year-old exchange student decided – on hearing that the police wanted to visit the arsenal he’d build up in her house – to gather up his guns and ammo and give them to a friend – for safekeeping, I guess. Keep it all safe until the visit from the authorities – triggered by a wee threat the exchange student made to slaughter everyone in his school – was over. Begone, 9 MM Glock and the 1600 rounds of ammunition! (The ammo was not merely for the Glock, but for an AK-47, an AR-15, and a shotgun).

UD is starting to enjoy recurrent features of the infinitely recurrent crazed-baby-with-an-arsenal story. Her favorite thing of all is the standard response of legal counsel to the wittle one’s situation.

Every one of them finds herself in the position of issuing public assurances that unstable children who make threats and accumulate

a military-style ballistic vest, crossbow with scope and light, 20 rounds of 9mm ammunition, military ski mask, ammunition clip loader, a strangulation apparatus known as a garrote, and other equipment

— plus a Glock and ammo not merely for the Glock but for the AK-47 he was in the process of assembling for himself, plus a shotgun — are sweet tow-headed exemplary lads trying to get a head start on their life-saving careers as policemen.

[This is] an affable, precocious student with no discipline or antisocial tendencies. The young man’s parents have flown in from Taiwan and fully support their child. Our investigation reveals that there was no intention to terrorize or otherwise commit any criminal act. The family is concerned by the rising level of rhetoric that is being transmitted to the news media and hopes that the public will keep an open mind as all the facts and circumstances are brought forward.” [The threat-issuer is simply] interested in a law-enforcement career and [is] planning to major in criminal justice at a university, [says his former attorney].

Back off, baby! Terroristic threats and extensive personal arsenals, collected at age 17, demonstrate affability and prosocial tendencies.

And how about this: His parents love him! And look out cuz they don’t like your rhetoric and there’s no telling what people in this family will do when they’re pissed off.

Plus good going undermining his intellectual development as he scopes out a new home for his arsenal: a dormitory.

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A boy and his toys. Awwwwwww.