Do you know how many high school basketball/football games end in gun fights in this country?
Lots; and the numbers are growing. Now watch as the phenom – utterly predictable as all of America resolves tiffs with one of the four hundred million guns available – moves to the college sports scene.
“Herschel was like a plane crash into a train wreck that rolled into a dumpster fire. And an orphanage. Then an animal shelter.“
A Republican comments on Herschel Walker.
To cite the title of your book.
If the first thing people discover when they Google your name is that you’re homophobic, they’re probably not going to want you to hang out with their children. Got that?
A young politician named Herschel
Has a brain that is all but inertial
His night and day REMs
Made it easy for DEMs
To run some amazing commercials
But how lovely the karma, dear readers!
… makes sure its universities share fully in this bounty. Its two highest-profile campuses – U New Mexico, and New Mexico State – are POP POP POP POPPIN away with healthy rivalry, on the basketball court and off! (For the long glorious sports history – there isn’t any other history – of both schools, go here.) Now that both schools’ teams are literally engaged in an ongoing shooting war, the basketball coaches have, uh, started to issue statements and shit.
When your schools are dumpsters instead of colleges, and when your basketball teams are gangs (with the coaching staff apparently part of the gangs), instead of basketball teams, you should…
Oh I dunno. You’re down there with your guns and your gangs, leading your best life now, living out loud, standing in your truth, letting a smile be your umbrella, and ain’t no place of mine to look at the carnage and say one damn word.
“I must say I’m very upset about the antisemitism in the U.S. today. It’s not fair. Kazakhstan is the number one Jew-crushing nation. Stop stealing our hobby. Stop the steal. Stop the steal.”
Man Jumps to his Death off
Mickey and Friends parking lot
at Disneyland
****************
For more Don DeLillo, postmodern, deaths, go here.
About 45,000 people in a central North Carolina county [full of retirees] remained without electricity Sunday afternoon after two electric substations were damaged by gunfire…
*******************
“T’aint nothin,” said Evelina Stanton, 95, a Moore County native, as she packed up a few belongings and moved to an emergency shelter for the week or more it will probably take to get the power back. “I liked to fool around with guns when I was young; we all did. No big deal.”
Indeed a spot poll among county residents showed a majority agreed with the statement GUNS SHOULD NOT BE TAKEN OUT OF THE HANDS OF DOMESTIC TERRORISTS.
********************
Gonna be a real Merry Christmas!
If you promise not to stage a revolution, we promise to pull back the boys we trained to kill all the women. Whaddaya say?
TO BLUR, WITH LOVE
Those golden days of blurring Jews
Because they’re girls are gone.
But we’ll take power soon
And then the blurring will still go on and on.
But why do we blur the girls
In a modern liberal democratic state?
Why do we treat them like Iran?
Israel covers and blurs
Because God said women are profane.
The fleshly filthiness of girls
Makes pious haredim insane.
Your wigs and baths and heavy robes
Will please the lord above
And so your newest government says
To blur! with love.
Pool stammered and said he disagreed with the implication that Jews control the media.
*************************
[Alex Jones] … seemed uncharacteristically rattled as Ye began talking favorably about Hitler.
**************************
Physicians are starting to see a subvariant of aphasia which they are calling afascia: The sudden inability to articulate your fascism, typically occurring when publicly confronted by a more vehement fascist speaker.
In two recent cases, recounted here, fascist adherents “stammered,” and were “rattled,” in the face of a fellow fascist who failed to disguise – as both of the adherents have learned to do – his murderous antisemitism.
Afascia robs its victims of the capacity to speak their fascism only in the specific circumstance of overpowering homicidal verbal challenge; so the good news is that it is highly treatable by the simple expedient of avoiding the most blatant and articulate fascists. Researchers are also looking into identifying fascists of this sort and subjecting them to The Soros Method: a short course of treatment during which they learn to reference the name George Soros whenever they want to say We need to bring back Hitler to kill all the Jews.
Since Lake Charles is just about the most dangerous place in the country, itty bitty clubs like the VVS1 Hooka Lounge have EIGHT security guards. Eight! How many people can be in a hooka club on a Tuesday? Thirty? But so many of them carry guns and shoot em off that a itty bitty club on a Tuesday night has 8 – count ’em – 8 – armed guards.
*************************
Now, even though they say right there on their website that they have outdoor as well as indoor spaces, in the harsh light of last week’s mass shooting there, the owner seems surprised that
weapons were brought in through the court yard where a tent was set up.
Oh, they brought them in through that door!
That’s what I mean by can-do. You close off one avenue, we’ll find another. Then we’ll kill everybody.
****************************
Lake Charles Strong. We’ll come back from this tragedy better armed, with much bigger guns in the hands of younger and more insane people, courtesy of gun-friendly Louisiana.
Did I say gun-friendly? We can do better than that! Louisiana has the highest murder rate of any state in America. VVS1 can’t shut down. We have a record to uphold.
Dr. Bernard Carroll, known as the "conscience of psychiatry," contributed to various blogs, including Margaret Soltan's University Diaries, for which he sometimes wrote limericks under the name Adam.
New York Times
George Washington University English professor Margaret Soltan writes a blog called University Diaries, in which she decries the Twilight Zone-ish state our holy land’s institutes of higher ed find themselves in these days.
The Electron Pencil
It’s [UD's] intellectual honesty that makes her blog required reading.
Professor Mondo
There's always something delightful and thought intriguing to be found at Margaret Soltan's no-holds-barred, firebrand tinged blog about university life.
AcademicPub
You can get your RDA of academic liars, cheats, and greedy frauds at University Diaries. All disciplines, plus athletics.
truffula, commenting at Historiann
Margaret Soltan at University Diaries blogs superbly and tirelessly about [university sports] corruption.
Dagblog
University Diaries. Hosted by Margaret Soltan, professor of English at George Washington University. Boy is she pissed — mostly about athletics and funding, the usual scandals — but also about distance learning and diploma mills. She likes poems too. And she sings.
Dissent: The Blog
[UD belittles] Mrs. Palin's degree in communications from the University of Idaho...
The Wall Street Journal
Professor Margaret Soltan, blogging at University Diaries... provide[s] an important voice that challenges the status quo.
Lee Skallerup Bessette, Inside Higher Education
[University Diaries offers] the kind of attention to detail in the use of language that makes reading worthwhile.
Sean Dorrance Kelly, Harvard University
Margaret Soltan's ire is a national treasure.
Roland Greene, Stanford University
The irrepressibly to-the-point Margaret Soltan...
Carlat Psychiatry Blog
Margaret Soltan, whose blog lords it over the rest of ours like a benevolent tyrant...
Perplexed with Narrow Passages
Margaret Soltan is no fan of college sports and her diatribes on the subject can be condescending and annoying. But she makes a good point here...
Outside the Beltway
From Margaret Soltan's excellent coverage of the Bernard Madoff scandal comes this tip...
Money Law
University Diaries offers a long-running, focused, and extremely effective critique of the university as we know it.
Anthony Grafton, American Historical Association
The inimitable Margaret Soltan is, as usual, worth reading. ...
Medical Humanities Blog
I awake this morning to find that the excellent Margaret Soltan has linked here and thereby singlehandedly given [this blog] its heaviest traffic...
Ducks and Drakes
As Margaret Soltan, one of the best academic bloggers, points out, pressure is mounting ...
The Bitch Girls
Many of us bloggers worry that we don’t post enough to keep people’s interest: Margaret Soltan posts every day, and I more or less thought she was the gold standard.
Tenured Radical
University Diaries by Margaret Soltan is one of the best windows onto US university life that I know.
Mary Beard, A Don's Life
[University Diaries offers] a broad sense of what's going on in education today, framed by a passionate and knowledgeable reporter.
More magazine, Canada
If deity were an elected office, I would quit my job to get her on the ballot.
Notes of a Neophyte