It’s called HANDMADE SHOTGUN, in honor of the shooter who killed Shinzo Abe.

A spokesman for Black Rifle Coffee explained: “He made his own shotgun. Cool.”

… all nations – even Japan, with its incredibly low gun ownership/gun death rates – will have to assume that a madman with a gun lurks somewhere at even modestly significant public events.

If this can happen in Japan, it can happen anywhere. Grim as it is, public officials in most of the world are going to need American-level security, or something close to it. The guns have won.

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The killings used to creep up on you, didn’t they? A mall shot up in Copenhagen, a woman walking her baby on the upper east side shot pointblank in the head… You take each instance in (keeping vaguely in mind, to be sure, that in places like Chicago and Tijuana everybody’s shooting everybody else to death day and night) and there’s a shudder and a disbelief and a disgust and then you move on. Only gradually does it occur to you that it’s now everywhere and all the time – the bangbangbang of people killing other people with guns. The panic my friend Steve experienced when he realized his wife was on the same street as the shooter here in DC, on Upper Connecticut Avenue… When I heard his voice on the phone hours after the shooter killed himself — that was I guess the moment for me. No more waving off all the gun killing as somehow peripheral to me. What world do I think I’m living in?

What a poor sport this newswoman is. (Scroll down for the video.) She actually cited the astounding suicide-by-gun statistic among veterans – the very group the Dallas Cowboys claim to be helping by promoting blood-soaked Black Rifle Coffee.

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There are now reports that the Cowboys are about to announce a second coffee partnership, this one with CTE Coffee, the brew for people who love football-induced neurodegenerative disease. Each flavor is named after a dead CTE sufferer – Jovan Belcher, Dave Duerson, Frank Gifford, Aaron Hernandez, Junior Seau – and each features a graphic of their pockmarked postmortem brains. Strong stuff, you say? You betcha! The Cowboys are calling CTE America’s Brew cuz no one does lethal head blows the way we do! If you don’t like it, move to North Korea.

[Trump] is a uniquely tiresome individual, easily the sorest loser, the most prodigious liar, and the most interminable victim ever to occupy the White House. He is, quite possibly, the biggest crybaby ever to toddle across history’s stage, from his inaugural-crowd hemorrhage on day one right down to his bitter, ketchup-flinging end. Seriously, what public figure in the history of the world comes close? I’m genuinely asking…

Mark Leibovich continues:

[Lindsay Graham] could not believe what Trump could get away with. It created a mystique, especially among politicians, who tend to be rule-bound by nature and chronically petrified of being exposed as frauds. Trump had no such fear of rules or capacity for embarrassment. He was a pure and feral rascal…

My mind roils with thought experiments of what else Republicans could tolerate from him: What if Mike Pence had been hanged? One would hope it would have been disqualifying, but who knows?

And don’t forget: There’s a good chance a family just like this lives in your town!

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A Glock for my favorite psychotic

Now that you’ve turned fifteen!

Just like the dad of Kip Kinkel

I’m proud of my own string bean!

[I’ve] seen dozens of other young men stay sober & become fruitful members of society, [so] these are not the only two options.

There are tens of thousands of stories like this one – ordinary Americans defending themselves — in this case, from the government trying to get between a boy and his dog — with their weapons. They do it to preserve the freedom to live as they wish. Bravo, young man.

[T]he most impressive achievement [Alabama Senator Richard] Shelby leaves behind is the military-industrial complex he supplied with lavish federal aerospace and defense contracts in Alabama’s 5th Congressional district, which sent [Mo] Brooks to Washington to chew off the “Big Government” hand that fed it. The local monument to the senator’s powerful career is the Shelby Center for Science and Technology at the University of Alabama Huntsville. The building is best known as the scene of the 2010 mass shooting in which Amy Bishop, a biology professor denied tenure, pulled a semi-automatic pistol out of her purse during a faculty meeting and executed three colleagues (she pleaded guilty and is serving a life sentence).

On the bipartisan gun-safety bill recently signed into law, Shelby voted against even sending it to the Senate floor, leaving his A+ NRA rating unbloodied.

Shelby’s presumptive successor is of course a champion of the “God-given Second Amendment,” but she also sells herself as a “Mama on a mission.” To a future Senator [Katie] Britt, that means that “our children should be taught to love this country” — a nation so exceptional that our children die at their school desks in order to preserve our freedoms.

Even so, it don’t seem fair that respectable publications like Newsweek run articles sayin we gonna run our bloodhounds up down and all ’round the coochees of … certain people as they attempt to exit the state at transportation hubs. This scurrilous claim has been fact checked and is not true.

Let’s set things straight: The real story is that the state has set up a so-called WAND SQUAD composed of legislators, stationed at airports and train stations, who will be empowered to insert transducers into certain people. But never fear! They will definitely be using probe gel.

You go, Mom!

… Gravitas restaurant. The phrase is from their website.

I’d like all the details, but I respect her privacy.

… we can notch one little victory.

That only leaves Donald Trump (but – ne quittez pas! we’re def. working on it), Jerry Jones (who loves his coffee so strong it’ll blast the top of your head off), the world’s current trove of tinpot dictators (I already said Trump – who, though out of office, remains a terrible threat to humanity – I mean all the other guys), V. Putin, etc etc etc.

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Though UD will admit to having had a soft spot for Boris. His tousled oddness carries with it a Gilbert and Sullivan Oscar Wilde PG Woodhouse Lord Peter Wimsey something that makes her heart go pitapat.

Doing it a day after a deadly shooting in a Chicago suburb, and a month-and-a-half after 19 children and two teachers were massacred in Uvalde, Texas … lacks morals, decorum, human decency, or any term you’d use for a person who trades their soul for a few dollars and a latte.

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More on the Dallas Cowboys coffee partnership.

Seems richly ironic, but once you drift into theocracy you can certainly expect this outcome.

And I know you’re more taken up with not being annihilated in an American gun massacre, but keep in mind that Harvard’s Adrian Vermeule and his merry band of authoritarian theocrats would love it if America looked like Israel. Only ruled by reactionary Catholics, not ultraorthodox Jews.

Ah cmon! It’s like all those HANG MIKE PENCE chants at our last president’s rallies: Just really, really, violent people having fun.

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It’s nice to think of American kids experiencing their first cup of coffee in Cowboys stadium…

“What’ll it be, buddy?”

“Trying to decide, Dad. Suck my Glock, Kill-Myself-Colt, Mutilate-the-Missus-Mauser and Slaughter on Psychotic Ten-Year-Old Avenue all sound good!”