If you’re from Texas you know this venerable phrase, reminding you every morning to pack your cock (not Glock) in your knapsack (UD is so old she calls backpacks knapsacks) before you go to school. It’s part of a campus-wide protest against the new conceal-carry-in-classrooms law.
UD, a fervent supporter of this nascent open dildoes movement, admits to struggling a bit with the concept, though. What is the connection between showing a dildo in public and protesting against people bringing concealed guns to university classes?
At first blush, the gesture sounds merely aesthetic:
Cocks Not Glocks, a [University of Texas Austin] protest group formed last fall, is urging students and others to openly carry the sex toys around campus, offering a multicolored counterpoint to the concealed weapons that holders of handgun licenses can now legally carry inside UT classrooms and most buildings.
One of the organizers elaborates:
“As long as you have a dick on your backpack, people will be thinking about the guns inside of other people backpacks” [Jessica] Jin said Tuesday, dildo strapped to her backpack.
So it’s an aide–mémoire, a way of jogging your memory about the new fact of concealed guns all around you. Plus: obscene/obscene:
“The State of Texas has decided that it is not at all obnoxious to allow deadly concealed weapons in classrooms; however, it does have strict rules about free sexual expression, to protect your innocence. You would receive a citation for taking a dildo to class before you would get in trouble for taking a gun to class. Heaven forbid the penis.”
However, the university has announced it’s down with the dong, the more the merrier, go ahead with the dildoes, so the obscenity thing lacks a certain oomph.
I guess UD thinks of it as a counter-demonstration sort of thing, a provocative, amusing “response” to conceal carry… Also maybe a comment on guns as an aide-de-male-sexual-inadequacy-feelings? The gesture certainly skews female, certainly suggests a mordant womanly comment on boys and their toys…
Anyway there’s a rally on campus today and you should go if you’re in town because there’s something deeply shameful – not to mention dangerous- about so many guns out and about in states like Texas. UD doesn’t blame the UT architecture dean for resigning and moving to a non-lunatic state in response to campus carry (which, if I know Texas, will very soon be campus open carry), and she certainly hopes other faculty follow. Already a number of people who had planned to enroll as UT students have announced they’ll go to gun-free schools instead. And now you’ve got the dildo brigade, which is at once amusing and deadly serious.
It’s an annual autumn ritual in America: College presidents and trustees all over the country snap to it and notice that they’re running a student-chiseling, all-football, all-losses, no-attendance operation…
No, that’s wrong. What actually happens is that other people (legislators, faculty, journalists, students) notice with the start of another academic year how beyond-belief bad things are in places like the Alaska public university system, and those people make noise and that noise forces the mindless somnolent deluded sports-loving trustees and presidents to…
To say this is the end of sports as we know it at our university!
Yes, these stewards of the university have figured out that you can shut everyone up each year by saying ridiculous shit like you’re right we’re just gonna have to cease all physical activity on campus:
There are three athletics options under consideration by the university. Under the first, the University of Alaska Anchorage and University of Alaska Fairbanks would end all sports.
WHAAAAA….???? My lower intestine just curled around itself and I’m losing control of my bowels… Please no… no…
So that’s the basic move, whether you’re EMU or Fairbanks or dozens of other ridiculous hemorrhaging jockshops – scare the fuck out of people and wait for them to shut up.
Clinton also provided insight into how she’s preparing to handle Donald Trump’s freewheeling, improvisational style in their upcoming general election debates.
“I am drawing on my experience in elementary school,” she said before imitating a boy pulling on a girl’s pigtails.
BAYLOR FOOTBALL SEEKS TO REDEFINE ITS IMAGE
It’s a terrific local propaganda piece, appearing days after one of Baylor’s football players was filmed viciously beating his dog. The player doesn’t make an appearance in the piece; instead, the football coach is quoted going on at length about
“We have a lot of really, really good kids… All I can speak to is since I’ve been at Baylor. We’ve lost some kids that were dealt with previously [this is the coach’s delicate allusion to rapists], but the kids I’ve been associated with are quality kids…”
Kids, kids, kids! UD loves it when coaches talk about their players as though they’re little boys… And they do it all the time. They’re the daddy; the kids are their boys… And there’s nothing like a boy and his dog to bring a tear to the eye, is there? Just one of coach’s adorable charges… Already 25,000 very angry people have signed petitions, a few days after the dog beating, calling for the coach to throw the lad off the team… but… you know… he’s a quality kid and just needs a little talking-to from Dad. Nothing wrong with him really except he, you know, likes to beat dogs. Not even worth mentioning in this local story about how in lots of other ways Baylor football – hell, Baylor University – would really like to redefine its image.
But what are you going to do? A disgraced president finally forced out; a huge and growing rape scandal; a football player starring in a home video all about his fondness for flogging animals… The stuff just keeps coming. Maybe Baylor should ask itself why.
The U of Smell is about to smell to even higher heaven.
… 197 of 682 paragraphs in [Mexican President Enrique] Pena Nieto’s [law] thesis were copied from authors ranging from Mexican historian Enrique Krauze to University of New Mexico academic Linda Hall.
A Hungarian member of the European Parliament has … caused an outcry on Twitter after writing that pigs’ heads along the border fence erected by Hungary to keep out migrants would make an effective deterrent.
“RNC Releases New Paid Web Ad ‘Hillary Clinton’s Liberal Elite Summer Tour’”: “highlighting her string of fundraisers with the liberal elite in wealthy enclaves like Nantucket, Cape Cod, and Beverly Hills, a reminder of how out-of-touch she is and a clear sign of whose priorities she will really be championing if elected president.”
Trump held fundraisers in Nantucket and Martha’s Vineyard earlier this month, and he owns a home in Beverly Hills.
… Baylor’s latest depraved scholarship student/hero football player to be dismissed from the team. (He should also be dismissed from the school.)
Baylor University, a Christian university with a repulsive moral history (type Baylor in my search engine if you dare), has no problem retaining this person as a student and as a football player.
Only unrelenting pressure from the civilized world can have any effect on the people running this sordid university. Such pressure managed to get rid of Ken Starr. It can manage to get rid of the dog abuser.
Everyone from the president on down games the university ranking system.
The school is about pretty much nothing except football games.
The school’s budget goes to
an HD theater, a barber shop, a nine-hole putt-putt course, a golf simulator, a basketball court, laser tag, a bowling alley, an indoor slide and outdoor firepit
for football players.
Clemson: Games within games within games.
Buy a drink and pull a chair
Up to the edge of the dance floor
Bouncers bouncing through the night
Trying to stop or start a fight
Six University of Notre Dame football players got in so much trouble between last Friday night and Saturday morning that UD is worried they won’t be ready for church today.
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But that’s the least of it. Six players is a lot for a team to lose, and there’s a season of football to be played.
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No, no, calm down. They’ll all be back on the field in minutes. America’s most famous Catholic university offers compassion to its students who carry loaded unregistered handguns, beat up policemen, and resist arrest. After Friday and Saturday, there’s Sunday, when you receive forgiveness.
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So. Six Notre Dame FB players arrested overnight. One more and [Coach] Brian Kelly gets a free sub, I think.
Rick Gregg
It’s been real, following the University of Nebraska on this blog. This proud enabler of Lawrence Phillips, Richie Incognito and a host of other great players has its own system for figuring out a person’s age: Three years per DUI. So in keeping his recruitment coach in the program after the man’s third DUI, Nebraska’s AD notes that the 45-year old is after all “a young man” with his whole life before him. So 45 in DUI years means that the guy is actually only fifteen years old.
In helping to put this guy back on the road to his fourth DUI, Nebraska’s AD showed the sensitivity and moral clarity for which this university has become famous.
“[We knew] we weren’t going to make everybody happy, especially those who have been uniquely affected by that sort of behavior. So we respect that and appreciate that.”
Yes, those of you paralyzed for life or, you know, bereft of a child because of people who drive drunk – you have certainly been uniquely affected! And we can all totally understand and appreciate that you might have an exaggerated reaction to this sort of thing because of your unfortunate personal experiences…
If you’ve taken an antiemetic in the last hour or so, feel free to put Nebraska in my search engine to review the history of this wasteland.
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UD thanks John.