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UD’s grandfather, father, and uncle…

… all graduated from Johns Hopkins University. UD almost went there.

As Baltimoreans, all of these people knew and know that it’s Johns, with an S; but most people say John.

The university has finally tired of correcting everyone all the time. UD‘s friend Courtney, who works at Hopkins, sends her this article from the university’s website:

(Baltimore, April 1, 2010) The Johns Hopkins University announced today that it is bowing to the inevitable and officially changing its name to “John Hopkins.”

“We give up,” university President Ronald J. Daniel said. “We’re fighting a losing battle here. And we strongly suspect the extra ‘s’ was a typo in the first place.”

Since its establishment in 1876 as America’s first research university, Daniel said, anyone and everyone has stumbled over “Johns Hopkins,” omitting the seemingly superfluous “s” altogether or dropping it randomly into the name anywhere but where it belonged.

… Squads of staff members fanned out early today over the university’s campuses throughout the Baltimore-Washington area; in Bologna, Italy; and in Nanjing, China. They employed screwdrivers, chisels, spackle, spray paint – whatever it took to remove the annoying surplus sibilant from residence halls, lab buildings, buses and trucks.

“Thank heavens,” a history of art/flute double major said as she joined a grounds crew trying to pry a particularly recalcitrant consonant from the East Gate at the Homewood campus. “It’s bad enough trying to convince everyone that we’re not all pre-meds. But correcting people’s pronunciation 41 times a day? It’s just exhausting.”…

Margaret Soltan, April 1, 2010 7:51AM
Posted in: the university

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11 Responses to “UD’s grandfather, father, and uncle…”

  1. Brett Says:

    Correcting pronunciation 41 times a day? An interesting choice of number.

  2. Roxie Says:

    Has to be an April Fool’s joke, don’t you think?

  3. Bill Gleason Says:

    I understand that the Ohio State University also has squads of cheerleaders out telling the community that it is OK to call the place Ohio State.

  4. Townsend Harris Says:

    Driving to Baltimore early this AM in the old pickup. Got the air compressor and jack hammer in the back. Stopping off at Tractor Supply for a new chisel blade. I’ll make Hopkins before noontime. Gonna get me one of them big, fat S’s.

  5. Crimson05er Says:

    Clever. Particularly like the use of “41,” which is up there with “37” and “17” as among the funniest-sounding numbers.

    Happy April Fool’s.

  6. Ellie Says:

    And here I thought it was the gratuitous article “The” that was the stumbling block.

  7. Jeff Says:

    And the University of Nebraska is adopting the motto “N is for NOWLEDGE!”

    About time.

  8. Dave Stone Says:

    Can consonants just disappear?
    Damn right, in a tough fiscal year.
    A budget’s pulled from the brink
    By the savings on ink.
    Hopkin: get your S out of here!

  9. Margaret Soltan Says:

    Jeff: LOL.

  10. MattF Says:

    All those spare s’s should be offered at a discount to Silver Spring.

  11. Josh Says:

    In related news, revered JHU prof Richard Macksey will replace the “cks” with an “x” and forget seven of the thirteen languages he reads, “Because journalists keep saying ‘half a dozen’ anyway.”

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