AS UD got off the Farragut North metro train this morning and trudged up the perpetually non-functioning escalator, she pulled her fare card out of her jacket pocket and got ready to insert it into the exit gate.
At the exit gate, she saw something she’d never before seen in a metro station. The station manager had positioned himself inches from departing passengers and was saying to every one of them, in a very loud voice: GOOD MORNING! GOOD MORNING!! GOOD MORNING!!! THANK YOU FOR USING METRO. HAVE A BEAUTIFUL DAY. HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY. BYE NOW. THANK YOU. MAY YOUR DAY BE BEE YOO TIFUL. THANK YOU.
UD felt vaguely threatened by the blast-effect of this good will and said nothing, as did most everyone else. But one woman met and raised the stakes. AND GOOD MORNING TO YOU! GOOD MORNING! GOOD MORNING!! Shook his hand.
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Although she thought she’d put plenty of money on her fare card earlier at Grosvenor station (after twenty-five years, UD doesn’t know the fare from Bethesda to Foggy Bottom; she just puts a bunch of dollars on the card), she was short a dollar. Off to the AddFare machine.
The AddFare machine takes only singles and fives. UD had a single, but it was so faded and thinned that the machine rejected it. She had no fives. She had tons of twenties.
No problem. She’d do the thing with change. Scrounging the bottom of her bag, she came up with all sorts of coins. But they turned out to be euros.
Nothing to be done but interrupt the station manager’s greetings with her problem. She crept up to him as he buoyantly readied his shtick for the next batch of exiters. She felt oppressed by her stupidity (if she were smart, she’d use a SMART card) and guilty at interrupting his shtick…
He took one look at her woefully waving her card, opened the exit gate, and bellowed JUST GO ON THROUGH. YOU’RE FINE. GO ON THROUGH. HAVE A BLESS-ED DAY.
April 6th, 2011 at 6:51AM
Ah, the Farragut North greeter guy. He’s been there in the morning for the last few weeks. I’d been wondering if I was the only one creeped out and irritated by it.
Also, I’m sorely tempted to ask if there was an elevator he could go fix, or at least help direct the traffic, even though I know this would be a really obnoxious thing to do. Guess I’m amused or glad to hear he was some use to someone.
April 6th, 2011 at 6:58AM
Ellie: I almost never get out at Farragut North – I decided I wanted a longer walk to campus that morning – so I didn’t know he’d been in business for awhile…
April 7th, 2011 at 7:28AM
I haven’t been on the Metro for a long time, but they don’t have debit/credit card readers on the AddFares? Geez, we even have them on pop machines in Mediocrevilleburgton–and we’re not even scheduled to get flush toilets until 2020.
April 7th, 2011 at 11:32AM
tp: No – if I’m not mistaken, they don’t have debit/credit card readers…