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The Baylor Hymn: Toting Up the Rapes

Practice in the morning – throwing, blocks, and tackles –
Practice in the noontide, til the drunken eve;
Waiting for the hostess and the time of raping,
Waiting for the lawyers, toting up the rapes.

Toting up the rapes, toting up the rapes,
One suit says it’s fifty – lads are in a scrape!
Toting up the rapes, toting up the rapes,
Trustees come together seeking an escape.

Raping in the sunshine, raping in the shadows,
Fearing neither cop nor courtroom’s chilling breeze;
By and by complainants and the press condemn us
Now our rapes are over – there is no reprieve.

Going forth with weeping, losing field advantage,
Though the loss sustained our spirit often grieves;
When our weeping’s over, we’ll bid new recruits welcome.
We’ll regain position, toting up the rapes.

Margaret Soltan, January 28, 2017 11:12AM
Posted in: forms of religious experience, sport

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3 Responses to “The Baylor Hymn: Toting Up the Rapes”

  1. Greg Says:

    A somewhat grim hymn of my prelapsarian, Presbyterian youth. Strange, I must have never listened to the lyrics.

    Also strange, a set of Stevens poems sounds more like liturgy to me than anything from organized religion.

    But, I’ve digressed from the Church of Div I football and its many human sacrifices.

  2. JND Says:

    I’m so old I remember when we actually sang “Bringing in the Sheaves” in church. I was also young enough that I had no idea what a sheave was.

  3. Margaret Soltan Says:

    JND: My mother used to sing it at home. I heard it a lot growing up.

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