… shuttering the University of Kansas. Inspired by their leader Viktor Orban’s shuttering of one of Europe’s best universities because it was educating Hungarians, Kansas Republicans will argue that as the epicenter of independent thought in the state, KU must shoulder significant blame for the recent landslide electoral victory for individual rights.
“Something has to happen here,” said Republican legislator Patrice O’Neill. “We have footage of zygotes screaming in agony, and you’re never going to be exposed to that at KU.”
“We know that support for abortion rights correlates closely with level of education,” commented representative Mike Walsh, “and it’s a no-brainer – haha – that tertiary schooling is the core of the problem here.”
“We’d be killing two birds with one stone,” added another legislator, Marnie McCoy. “KU’s curriculum is a toxic stew of gender studies and devil worship. It’s time to pull the plug.”
August 7th, 2022 at 2:55PM
Such is our current condition that it took me a moment to recognize that this was parody. But then I realized that there’s no way even the most extremist Kansas legislators would recommend closing KU without a provision for preserving Jayhawks basketball.
August 7th, 2022 at 5:48PM
TAFKAU: I thought about adding sports-related snark, but decided to go for total shut-down.