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Scathing Online Schoolmarm scathes through the desperate auctioning of a house.

Harcourts Westside, under the visionary leadership of Ty Cueva, announces the auction of the unparalleled Somma Estate at 10697 Somma Way.

The house has gone unsold for over eight years, during which the asking price has plummeted from 100 million to 75 mill to 30 mill to ok how bout please rent it for 200 thou a month. Cueva auctioned it last March, and the current listing only says pending. The dude is some kinda visionary.

In an unprecedented move in the luxury real estate market, Ty Cueva, CEO of Westside Property Group and the driving force behind Harcourts Westside, has listed The Somma Estate for auction. 

Unprecedented used as a synonym for humiliating. Interesting.

The Somma Estate stands apart in its fusion of opulent amenities and homely elegance. 

The writer’s zeal to convince you that a 40,000 sq ft construction feels warm and homey leads her down a perilous path to homely, which means ugly.

[The house has] an extraordinary 21 bathrooms.

For the discerning billionaire with chronic explosive diarrhea. Extraordinary.

It’s a self-contained utopia offering a 25-meter indoor pool, steam room, sauna, fitness studio, and even a full-size indoor basketball court, all enveloped in the warmth of a family home.

LOLOLOLOL

 The Somma Estate is introduced to auction with a starting bid of $30,000,000, a pivot from its previously higher price points. This decision underscores Harcourts Auctions’ commitment to fostering competitive bidding while making the property accessible to a broader range of affluent buyers.

We’ll take anything! What can you pay?

Margaret Soltan, July 24, 2024 9:10AM
Posted in: Scathing Online Schoolmarm

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2 Responses to “Scathing Online Schoolmarm scathes through the desperate auctioning of a house.”

  1. gasstationwithoutpumps Says:

    Perhaps the writer is British—I understand that “homely” still means “homey” in British English (at least it did in my Mom’s day).

  2. Margaret Soltan Says:

    You’re right. But I’m assuming this is an American writer – for an American audience.

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