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Tom Goldstein Issues Himself a Preemptive Pardon

A couple of months ago, he argued that a man who makes under the table payments to women for sex, cheats on his taxes, and so on, should have all cases against him dropped IF he’s an exceptional person – like, frinstance, if he’s the just-elected president of the United States.

Now Goldstein has himself been indicted on “four counts of tax evasion, 10 counts of aiding and assisting the preparation of false and fraudulent tax returns, five counts of willful failure to pay taxes, and three counts of making a false statement on a loan application.”

He also seems to have hired women he was shtupping to work at his law firm, where their duties were apparently extremely specialized.

He lived a mile or two from UD, in sooperprestigious Chevy Chase, but then decided he wanted something even prestigiouser — a $2.6 million DC manse — and reportedly committed mortgage fraud to get it.

But all should be forgiven, if you follow his NYT opinion piece about dropping all charges against Trump, because he, like Trump, is a very exceptional individual.

Margaret Soltan, January 28, 2025 4:10PM
Posted in: kind of a little weird

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3 Responses to “Tom Goldstein Issues Himself a Preemptive Pardon”

  1. TAFKAU Says:

    “He also seems to have hired women he was shtupping to work at his law firm, where their duties were apparently extremely specialized.”

    Assisting with the content of his briefs, I assume.

  2. Margaret Soltan Says:

    TAFKAU: Peeing myself.

  3. University Diaries » ‘Defendant now objects to posting as collateral the very same residence that, per the Indictment, he would not have been able to purchase but for his fraudulent misconduct.’ Says:

    […] We all enjoy watching a tool who used to tool around town in a $300,000 Ferrari fall totally and publicly to pieces. It’s […]

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