… and will certainly appoint, as next president, a go along to get along good ol’ boy. Paging John Thrasher!

College Park is happier than a trash can full of vomit.

*****************

“[S]everal [football] players, including starters, walked out of [a] meeting with” the reinstated coach.

Bad, scary coach stays and university president goes. Datz the way it is, kids.

She plays one-minute-per-move games against cold brilliant robots on this site, and will only play random boards because when you get a good random board you get all sorts of amazingly high point possibilities – imagine a seven-letter word spanning two triple-word scores…

However. I may be on the spectrum, but I have nothing on this dude, who seems to me well into idiot savant territory.

When your university’s long-term president, in his valedictory speech, prominently cites as one of the institution’s pressing future needs closing certain bars, you have a problem. When his ultimate-aspiration summation alludes to mayhem at the hospitals, rage among the neighbors, shootings into crowds, and appalling tailgate conditions, you really do need to ask yourself if the University of South Carolina is a university, or is instead what UD calls a unibrewery.

It’s truly a witches’ brew: Capitalists in the bars hauling in the cash from students; unibreweries afraid to do much because they’re in competition for students with other unibreweries; a larger culture of massive alcohol addiction; guns guns guns guns guns. Mix briskly and stand back.

***************

UD thanks Professor Mondo.

… a group features a
famous visitor to RB,
Justice Kavanaugh.

**********

UD thanks her sister for the picture.

… romana.

You do want to know? Okay, read these two pages (scroll down).

And now for an update, from a student writing in CMU’s campus newspaper.

[Virtually no spectators showing up for football games] is not exclusively a CMU problem. It’s the exact same problem that many other trivial Mid-American Conference schools face.

… The reported attendance at the CMU-WMU game was 10,097 people. By hand, I counted 255 people on the east side of the stadium at the end of the first quarter.

UD‘s very fond of a statement from CMU’s 2014 athletic director.

“Does it matter if you have no one at your game, or 15,000, or 110,000?” Heeke asked. “Does that somehow deem [sic] that you shouldn’t play football at this school because you can’t reach 15,000? [Like a lot of schools, CMU fudges like mad to pretend to the NCAA that it meets the minimal attendance standard.] If the school makes the decision to play football, why should it matter? It’s their decision how they want to manage the game and what they think their expectation is and what makes it a viable program.”

Does it matter that CMU paid this guy – Heeke – $300,000 a year when he made that statement? Does it matter that a public university runs an expensive and totally invisible football program? Does it matter that it has no one at its games? No! If the good people of Michigan, if CMU students and their parents, want to fund a bunch of guys (most of whom aren’t real CMU students) throwing a ball around in a huge pricey stadium GO FOR IT. We all know the state of Michigan’s so rich it doesn’t know what to do with its money.

… at the Sea Witch Festival. Costume parade, dog parade, bonfires, the works. She will blog compulsively from there.

… to UD‘s bulls.

Click through the artworks here to see one of our Fangors, for sale next month at the New York Bonhams auction.

…world…

But it wouldn’t be nothing – nothing! – without a woman or a girl to abuse.

There’s Oxford professor in good standing Tariq Ramadan, lying through his teeth as long as he possibly could about his apparent rapes and now ah shit okay I did those two… But they were begging for it… There’s Yale professor in good standing Michael Simons who okay yes I was a bad boy but I’m suing you for a trillion dollars for taking away my named chair…

Behind every great man is a great man; Ramadan has his powerful male supporters; and then there’s Robert “Two Chairs” Alpern.

Ol’ Justice Buzzard
Had only just uttered
A word to his prisoners two;
But then on a dare
The courtroom was bare!
So Buzzard he tore off and flew.

The study goes on to note that despite a schedule mainly devoted to drinking, hazing, parties, football, basketball, and lacrosse, fraternity guys go on to do pretty well in the world.

***********

And I mean duh.

The idea was to fund a team to study carcinogenesis — how cancer starts. But in reality, [Jim] Allison soon discovered, they pretty much had free reign.

All good writers know never to use exclamation marks! I mean, almost never!

But UD has stumbled over a piece in the U Penn newspaper which demands exclamation marks. She will now quote some of the piece and insert the quotation marks its content demands.

In the wake of the admissions bribery scandal! involving former Penn men’s basketball star and coach Jerome Allen, Penn Dean of Admissions Eric Furda is saying that safeguards need to be put in place in both the athletics and admissions departments.

On Oct. 5, Allen, who is currently an assistant coach for the Boston Celtics, pleaded guilty to bribery in connection to the recruitment of a student athlete – now Wharton senior Morris Esformes – to gain him admission to the University. Allen had been implicated in an indictment of businessman Philip Esformes, who had allegedly defrauded the federal government of $1 billion!!! and had used some of that money to bribe Allen and help Morris get into Penn.

… Furda suggested new professional development and training for staffers in both departments to prevent future incidents of bribery!!!!

[So a guy comes at you with tens of thousands of dollars, private luxury jet trips on his dime, and anything else you want, and says in exchange for this I want my kid who can’t play competitive basketball to get a basketball scholarship and thereby admission to your school. Slowly, now. Think it through. Is this RIGHT or WRONG?]

… [Morris] Esformes was accepted to Penn in 2015 as a member of Allen’s final recruiting class before Allen was replaced by current coach Steve Donahue. Esformes never played or appeared !!!!! on the men’s basketball team’s roster.