… Mr UD muttered over this morning’s breakfast.

He began reading them to UD.

“TURTLE THAT USES GENITALS TO BREATHE IS THREATENED.

SPERM BANK SEEKS DONORS. MUST BE A COMMUNIST.”

*****************

“Well, as to the second,” said UD, “Didn’t Mao say “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single drip?“

No one went after the Russian oligarchs in print the way she did; so much so that Cambridge University Press was too scared to publish her book. (Simon and Schuster did.). In response to Cambridge’s retreat, Karen wrote the following, in 2014:

Last week the EU and the US Government issued a visa ban and asset freeze on the very inner core that is the subject of my book. Many works will now come out on the makeup of the list and why each individual was placed on it. The answers to these questions are in my book. Isn’t it a pity that the UK is a ‘no-fly’ zone for publishing the truth about this group? These Kremlin-connected oligarchs feel free to buy Belgravia, kill dissidents in Piccadilly with Polonium 210, fight each other in the High Court, and hide their children in British boarding schools. And as a result of their growing knowledge about and influence in the UK, even the most significant British institutions (and I think we can agree that CUP, with its royal charter, 500-year history and recent annual revenues in excess of $400m, is a veritable British institution) cower and engage in pre-emptive book-burnings as a result of fear of legal action…. [Perhaps some day we] can once again turn to CUP with the knowledge that it is indeed devoted to publishing “all manner of books” and not just those that won’t awaken the ire of corrupt Russian oligarchs out to make a further mockery of British institutions.

How topical, with the Russians still poisoning dissidents in London. How brave and lucid and true.

UD has covered many stories in which a person has lost his or her thesis. As physical objects, these things seem hard to hold onto; and what makes it worse is that in almost all of these cases the degree-granting university itself can’t seem to get hold of the thing. Where do they go?

Madrid regional president Cristina Cifuentes lost hers “in one of several house moves. The university has so far not presented it.”

[T]he post-graduate degree in Regional Law included 1,500 hours of classes, study and presentation, with students required to attend at least 80 per cent of classes.
However, none of the students … said they had ever seen Ms Cifuentes in class, despite the fact that she was already a well-known politician.

It also transpired that she only registered for the MBA three months after it began and that the marks for two of the 12 modules in her file had been given two years after the course was completed.

… The case has also tainted the university, which [a newspaper] says colluded with the politician in trying to cover up the affair with forged papers.

UD has a couple of suggestions to make. The first is obvious: 100% online class! Duh! Second: In response to students saying they never saw her. Cifuentes can claim that precisely because she is so famous, she went in disguise. What’s a burqa for?

A small airplane crashed Monday night on the TPC Scottsdale Champions Course and police confirmed there were multiple fatalities…

[Versace] King got about 100 yards and began recording video of the fiery crash. He said emergency crews were on the scene several minutes later. He added the weather was “perfect” at the time.

…The Champions course is one of two golf courses at the TPC Scottsdale. It is just east of the TPC Stadium Course, where the annual Waste Management Phoenix Open is held.

In the current case of Eric Noji, it’s odd that no one ever considered his self-description on his academic web page… odd.

Professor Eric K. Noji is a medical doctor, skilled wildlife biologist, passionate environmentalist and iconic figure in the humanitarian community whose medical work and travels to the most austere and hostile of environments on earth are both mythic in their epic sweep and inspirational in their chronology of self-sacrifice on behalf of children who are homeless, abused, starving, or left destitute by disasters, violence or war.

The phrase mythic in their epic sweep didn’t … seem… odd to anyone?

No one wondered why under skills and expertise he listed over one hundred specializations?

I mean, yes, after decades of alleged plagiarism and lies, Noji has been removed to Disgraced Rogue Central: Saudi Arabia. But no one seems able to convince the Institute of Medicine that they should rescind his membership.

After much anguishing, the IOM has decided that, okay,

membership [can] be rescinded if an individual provided false information before becoming a member.

Falsification, plagiarism or fabrication after a doctor becomes a member of the elite organization isn’t grounds for removal…

This sort of approach explains why Bernie Madoff maintained his country club memberships through much of his … unpleasantness. These places are private organizations and they’re a mite on the stodgy side and they like to do things their own way.

Once Bernie was carted off to prison for life because he stole $65 billion, his clubs apparently decided to take another look at his membership status…

And UD is going to guess that the big splashy New York Times article that just came out about the IOM and its highest-profile member might get its expulsion machinery cranking …

[Pennsylvania State University’s former president’s defamation case against Louis Freeh] could be overturned if [the president] were to successfully appeal his March 2017 conviction of one misdemeanor count of child endangerment.

And should [Graham] Spanier win that appeal, [he] will continue to pursue his case against Freeh.

[Former vice president Gary Schultz and former athletic director Tim Curley] were both also convicted on the same misdemeanor count, and were sentenced in July to a mix of prison time, house arrest and probation.

Spanier, whose sentence has been delayed pending his appeal, was seen playing the washboard at the Central Pennsylvania Festival of the Arts the same week the other two former administrators began their jail time.

————–

Or rather – times being what they are – fifty thousand bullets.

Syracuse was lucky – a gun store owner reported the student; his landlord happened to enter his apartment and told police about his arsenal; he’s not an American and was rapidly deported.

What about your school? Are things going to break your way?

Declaring itself “disappointed” with Norman, who began a constituent meeting in his state by taking out a loaded pistol and leaving it on a table between him the audience because – in Norman’s words – “I”m not going to be a Gabby Giffords,” the National Rifle Association has withdrawn its endorsement from a politician who – in the words of a spokesperson – “chose, in the face of danger, to display a pistol rather than open-carry an assault weapon.”

“Representative Norman’s preparation for his latest voter meet and greet included neither body armor nor PBIED,” the NRA press release noted. “Well-sourced reports also indicate that Norman greeted supporters at a recent Campaign Volunteers High Tea with little more than a pink Hello Kitty gun.”

“It was a last-minute event and I grabbed something from my toddler’s room,” said Norman, who pledged it would not happen again.

****************

Aw you guys is no fun!

The South Carolina Democratic Party released this statement: “According to Section 16-23-410 of the South Carolina code, “it is unlawful for a person to present or point at another person a loaded or unloaded firearm’…

“By his own admission, US Rep Ralph Norman brandished a loaded gun in a public setting on Friday to make a point. Not only were his actions irresponsible and dangerous – they were illegal.

“As any truly responsible gun owner knows and as the statute says, if you have a concealed carry permit, you cannot brandish your weapon without an imminent threat. It’s dangerous and it’s illegal. And today Congressman Norman showed us that he’s anything but responsible,’ said South Carolina Democratic Party Chairman Trav Robertson. “This is a felony offense and punishable by up to five years in prison. That’s why I will be sending an official request to SLED to investigate Congressman Norman’s dangerous actions.

Chairman Robertson continued, “Rep. Norman only did this because he barely got elected the first time and needs votes. He’s worried about his campaign. This was a stunt and he should be punished for violating the law. I hope law enforcement moves swiftly to resolve the matter. It didn’t work for Roy Moore and it won’t work for Ralph Norman.”

Well but t’aint the same! Ol’ Roy dint just brandish guns! He fucked underage girlies too!

This is SO unfair.

He still has two kids left over whose suicides he can assist.

It’s America’s newest pastime — when you run out of room at home for your 500th stockpiled weapon, start storing in your kid’s backpack.

Yet another state enacts a death with dignity law. That makes eight.

Getting there.

[Sun has] always been interested in building a law enforcement career and [has] already enrolled in a US university to study criminal justice, starting from August this year.

Let’s hope it’s a school that shares his passion for mass killing.

An astute evocation of university life as the utter death of independent thought.

Here at University Diaries, we’re following one of many stories involving teeny weeny middle school and high school students accumulating massive arsenals and tipping off school buddies that they plan to massacre everyone in the place. The buddies then tip off the principal, who tips off the police, who visit the babe’s home and find … you know … standard boy stuff…

In a sea of teenagers stockpiling weaponry with which to kill everyone at their school, this guy stands out for the sheer depth and range of his armory, apparently maintained with the happy collusion (encouragement?) of his parents in Taiwan and his host mother here. (His host mother, knowing the police were on their way, took the kid’s weaponry out of the house and gave it to a friend so she could lie and say the kid didn’t have weaponry. The police eventually found it anyway.)

All the major networks are featuring the kid and his famous parents (they’re actors in Taiwan), and Homeland Security is on the scene, reading all of his electronic devices. But hey. His parents have issued a request that we all respect their privacy as they go through the process of watching the American justice system put their kid away for years, onaccounta making terroristic threats and holding – hiding – mucho illegal weaponry is for some reason lately around here a very big deal.

Here’s why we should all stop talking about this: The folks have explained that it was all a linguistic misunderstanding – their kid said something, I guess, to his friend, but due to the language barrier an unfortunate misunderstanding ensued. Even if, haha, he did say something about killing everyone in his school, he was just kidding. Not only that, but all the personal armor in the kid’s stash was bought exclusively for Halloween. So keep your trap shut.