An Intercultural Whatever professor at Florida Atlantic University made each of his students write JESUS on a piece of a paper and then throw it on the floor and stomp on it.

http://www.upi.com/blog/2013/03/22/FAU-student-suspended-for-not-stomping-on-Jesus/2111363965625/

One of them refused to do it and complained to an administrator. The student was thrown out of the class.

Cheat fiercely, Harvard,
cheat, cheat, cheat.
Demonstrate to them our guile.
Although it’s neither just nor meet
It’s obviously the Harvard style.
How we shall celebrate our victory,
We shall all smirk at teams less sly than we
(How jolly!)
Say ‘unstable’ if you’re caught, and
Cheat, cheat, cheat!

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Sigh. Another cheating scandal at Harvard.

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My talented readers are invited to add verses.

… is the price of freedom.

People were thrilled when University College London banned a group of bigots from the university. UD wasn’t thrilled. See above. Efforts are ongoing to make Britain’s universities safe for sex segregation and hate speech. There will be successes along with near misses and failures. This is a campaign; and there’s no reason to believe UK schools are going to be able to handle it.

It’s how things have always been done at the University of Hawaii, proud flagship of one of our most corrupt states; and if you don’t like it, you can lump it.

For background, put hawaii in my search engine if you have the stomach for it.

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“It’s a common pattern in Hawaiian political culture to announce campaigns against corruption, but the problem is so deeply rooted with high-level officials that are involved, and there are low-level scapegoats who feel the brunt of the campaign,” said Jeff Jones, an associate history professor at UNC-Greensboro …”

Whoops. No. That should be Russian political culture. Russian.

… she ain’t go no tv.

… ballistics.

http://www.orlandosentinel.com/sports/blogs/chopping-block/os-cb-florida-state-seminoles-fsu-shooting-athletes-20130321,0,7078921.post

… John Wilson, artist.

Wilson knew UD’s father-in-law in Paris,
where they both studied with Leger.

… with good puns in them.

The story is so new that only this one has so far emerged:

Jane Goodall is Sorry for Monkeying Around Proper Attribution in New Book

Which is lame.

So… Can we do better? Monkey. Chimp. Goodall. Primatologist. Must be something here.

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OK:

GOODALL APES OTHERS’ PROSE

Yeah. Still lame.

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Totally predictable lame puns on the book title starting to appear:

Jane Goodall: Seeds of Plagiarism

Yeah.

… How about:

ME: Tarzan.
YOU: Plagiarist.

… and eventually people will start asking how you’re paying for it all.

http://news.nationalpost.com/2013/03/19/tenured-mcgill-professor-fired-after-accounting-twerps-uncover-159500-in-improper-spending/

Senator Charles Grassley – echt-American right-wing nerd – and Andrew Ross – left Euro hipster – find common ground in their disgust at the big-money machine New York University has become. Both wonder why a non-profit uses its extensive tax breaks to bleed its students for tuition, underpay its faculty, and give millions of dollars to administrators.

The culture gap between faculty and administration is pretty staggering lately. We’re scrambling to offer unpaid MOOCs; they’re looking for more Helen Dragas and Steve Cohens to put on the university’s board of trustees.

And indeed herein lies the problem, if you ask UD. Ross asks:

“Faculty who don’t necessarily get concerned with governance issues or for whom academic governance is not something that turns them on, these revelations I think turned the stomachs of a lot of people,” Ross added. “Just the scale of the payouts, multimillion dollar loans, multimillion dollar homes that were purchased, and the salaries. They really add up to a package of questions that have led to requests for further investigations.”

Part of the answer to this package of questions involves that board of trustees. NYU’s – like most fancy schools’- is dominated by hedge fund managers and the like. This means that over the last couple of decades the people with whom administrators consort on a daily basis are multimillionaires and even (Steve) billionaires. Larry Summers, Ruth Simmons – their immediate world has been the world of Goldman Sachs, where earning less than twenty million dollars a year is a mark of shame.

It’s not merely that high-ranking administrators these days consort with hedgies; like presidents Summers and Simmons, they often are hedgies, or they sit on the boards of hedge funds.

Trustees have always been rich, of course; but when ascending to an administrative university position now means that your compensation standard rises from six figures to seven or, uh, ten (Steve), you are going to feel compelled to shake down the school for big bucks. Otherwise you won’t be able to live with yourself.

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One practical recommendation for NYU from UD: Book a Greg Mankiw “politics of envy” talk and make faculty attendance mandatory.

Along with all of the other blessings of university-sponsored alcohol sales at football games (extra police, obnoxious behavior, etc.), you’d think making a profit would be a no-brainer. You charge thirsty idiots immense sums for camels’ piss — What could go wrong?

The University of Minnesota fought so hard for the right to sell booze at its stadium… Its president lobbied and testified… UM students deserved alcohol…

And it won! But now… Where’d all the money go?

… Tenured Radical and Joe Fruscione, are featured in this PBS report about academia and retirement.

The most macabre headline is this one, in USA Today:

EXPLOSIVE DEVICES, CORPSE, FOUND ON UCF CAMPUS

A dorm was evacuated, and the campus closed, after – in response to a 911 call – police found a dead person in a dorm room and, near him, an assault weapon and improvised explosive devices.

This is a big story because it’s part of an emerging new normal for certain disturbed Americans. UD guesses that this suicide had in mind going out with a bang, as in Aurora and Sandy Hook. For whatever reason, though, he decided to skip the part where he murders forty people, and instead went straight to killing himself.

… is featured in this morning’s Chronicle of Higher Education.

Not only am I the only gurrrrlll [scroll through the pages]… I’m the only one without a beard. Or at least stubble.

And yes. Fine. I’m also the only one who doesn’t have fifteen billion students. But then I’m the only one not teaching computing, engineering, or a how-to.

…has just been moved forward.

[Steven Cohen] maintains his innocence, despite SAC agreeing to pay the biggest insider trading fine levied by the SEC. Not only his reputation, but that of his industry, now rests on it.

One of America’s great universities is in the trust of the current biggest target of the Securities and Exchange Commission.

UD assumes there’s a person at Brown whose full-time job, at this point, is Steve-watching. If Cohen is pulled in by the government, and is still on Brown’s board at the time, it will be embarrassing for Brown, which has already had to dump one trustee for attracting the attention of the SEC… and there’s the recent embarrassment over its ex-president’s activities on the Goldman Sachs compensation committee…

Yes, in defenestrating Steve, Brown stands to lose not just millions but perhaps billions of dollars, Steve being the kind of guy who routinely takes in billions in compensation. But look at it this way: SAC is losing clients very rapidly, what with all the bad publicity. Steve will be paying a huge chunk of his billions in his own defense; and of course the firm has just paid out that big ol’ insider trading fine. There will be lawsuits against SAC by investors. Etc. The money might not be there anyway.