The killer was seventeen years old.

That’s because for decades Greek fans have been killing people and torching cities and all. The hapless government thinks a temporary pause and some more security cameras will bring Peace in Our Time, but this latest scheme will work out just as well as Chamberlain’s. I guess it’s real hard to confront the only thing to be done with a significant population of nihilist shits: No. More. Soccer.

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A BAD CROWD

Since that’s way rad an idea, let me say a bit more about pre-modern and postmodern crowds, and how they’re making crowds themselves obsolete.

The Greek football fans generate primitive, pre-modern crowding, all about atavistic drives among men. We had one of these recently in the States — the mass shooter at the Super Bowl victory parade was just, you know, hormones, spoiling for a fight.

Any scenario that surrounds fundamentally aggressive men with other young men will bring out the AK47 (that’s new — primitive cavemen had rocks), or, outside of gun-drenched USA, knives. And not just random young men: It was a signal cultural moment when the sixty year old owner of a soccer team got angry and ran onto the field during a game, with a gun in his outstretched hand to kill a referee.

You understand – yes? – the message Savvidis sent to all random hormoned-up young men? What I’m doing is a highly charismatic act.

You make matters worse when you present these people with established ‘enemies’ – opposing domestic or foreign teams. They don’t have to – like the Super Bowl shooter – go looking for enemies. You’ve set up a war for them to fight in, collectively, cuz they’re part of… a crowd.

And it’s an all-male, all-young crowd, right? Didn’t use to be, but over the years women children and older people have arrived at the conclusion that Greek soccer stadiums are not conducive to longevity, let alone a fun afternoon. So now you’ve concentrated the scariest element of society into loud sweaty excited rageful quarters.

So Greece is simply farther along in the evolution toward the end of crowds: It has watched for decades as its soccer matches – increasing numbers of them – devolve into fatal violence. It has tried everything, including, indeed, the end of crowds. The country is coming off of a two-month moratorium on soccer attendees.

But now that they’re letting these incredibly dangerous groups of people back in, what do they think is going to happen?

So, you know, we’re getting the stern announcements about enhancements of the police state they’ve already set up in the stadiums – vast numbers of security cameras, police, mandatory digital identification, weapon checks, blah blah.

Will it work? Keep your eye on Miami’s spring break. It’s happening right now. Those crowds are so awful that Miami released this ad a couple of weeks ago, and has made clear that it does in fact want the total end of those crowds. We don’t want you. Don’t come here. AND here are all the police state goodies we’re throwing at you if you come anyway. Let’s see if it works. Might make the guys madder, you know.

Anyway, so Greece. So what was once supposed to be A GAME, a certain thing, a sports gathering, is now – you understand? – a kind of lord of the flies free for all held perilously in check by insane levels of surveillance technology plus a very large, very frightened, security force. The players are scared, and not just the ones dreading racist chants. The referees? Forget about it. You know that groups of them have gone on strike because of the attacks.

So my thing is who’s kidding who. Eventually it won’t just be Savvidis packing heat. Obvious escalations of an already lurid situation are on their way, and we know from security’s inability to stop a mass shooting at the Super Bowl parade that guns are too quick and easy and lethal to police.

Think security will find weapons and confiscate them? Haha. Check out how many smuggled guns are discovered every day at all of America’s airports. People are always trying, and think about how many guns the TSA isn’t finding.

When crowds become impossible, what are your choices? You can try identifying and excluding the evil doers, but you’ll never get them all, and of course they’re evil enough to figure out how to get into the stadium no matter what you do. You can get to North Korean levels of police state apparatus, I guess (lines of soldiers with guns pointed at the crowd throughout? torture chambers below the locker rooms?), but this won’t be very… pretty. No, UD is thinking that Greece (and other countries) will have to shut down the whole thing.

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Our highly advanced postmodern crowds are a whole other thing. It’s their innocence that gets you. They are sitting ducks, awaiting the Las Vegas shooter, the Prague shooter, the Highland Park shooter. They are gathered to enjoy a concert, a parade, or just a sunny afternoon on the campus of Charles University. Massive, extensive, the highest of high-tech firepower rains down upon them from a heavily fortified genius who has thought everything out to guarantee he’ll be able to shoot for a long time and kill a lot of people.

I don’t think American parades or outdoor concerts have a very long shelf life either.

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Oh, and on the subject of Greek violence — We would be remiss if we didn’t mention the petrol bombs being thrown at police, even as we speak, in opposition to the government’s shocking intention to allow private universities to operate freely in Greece.

Yes! What’ll they think of next? Private, as well as, public universities!

Most Greeks are in favor; over 40,000 of the smartest young Greeks currently study abroad, having fled the squalid corrupt national system. (Put Greece university in my search engine.) Competition might wake up the dead public campuses and reverse the brain drain, but who would want to do that?

Yesterday, Faruk ran onto the field and punched a ref so hard the guy had to be helped up off the ground. Faruk has now been arrested. SO…

Things are getting so much better in world soccer! The last time a team owner ran onto the field and attacked a ref, he did it with a gun!

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photo credit: superlig

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Update: LOLOLOLOLOL

My aim was to react verbally to the referee and spit in his face. At this time, I slapped the referee in the face. The slap I gave did not cause a fracture. [The ref’s cheek was fractured.] After the slap I gave, the referee stood for about 5-10 seconds, then threw himself on the ground.  They immediately removed me from the scene because of my heart disease. Other than that, I am not aware of any incident that took place.

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL

Because of my heart disease, I hereby resign from the club and place myself in jail for assault.

Once an obscure school, Edinburg now captures the world’s attention with its football program’s amazing, award-winning defensive end, who … well, the thing that caught the world’s eye was his vicious attack on a referee who did something he didn’t like. But let’s roll the whole tape.

Edinburg High senior defensive end Emmanuel Duron, the team’s star defender, was flagged on a play early during the second quarter after he shoved an opposing offensive lineman to the ground and attempted to make a tackle on PSJA High freshman quarterback Jaime Lopez after the whistle had blown the play dead.

Duron and referee Fred Gracia exchanged words after the play was over, and Gracia ejected Duron from the contest after back-to-back unsportsmanlike penalties on the same play.

Duron, who was leading the Bobcats in tackles (102) and sacks (eight) through four games, then charged onto the field as teammates raced after him in an attempt to hold him back. The senior defensive end collided with Gracia, checking him chest-to-chest at full speed and sending him to the turf.

Duron was escorted out from the stadium by a team of four Edinburg police officers who were working security for the game. He was not handcuffed, but was removed from the premises and did not return.

… Duron was suspended for the remainder of the 2019-20 soccer season after a similar incident occurred during a match on the pitch last year against crosstown rival Edinburg Vela.

Duron was The Monitor’s All-Area Boys Wrestler of the Year last season.

You’ll note that I linked you to local coverage up there. Here’s Emmanuel Duron’s current Google News page. He and his school have really hit the big time.

I linked you to local stuff because in order to understand the sort of world that generates and lionizes notoriously violent eighteen year olds, you need to understand Texas. Everyone else headlines this story with words like violent, disgusting, shocking; the local press doesn’t even make reference to the assault.

Bittersweet: Bobcats beat

Bears for 6A playoff berth,

lose star defender

The most important thing, the headline thing, is that his team won; but the victory was “bittersweet” because they “lost” their “star defender.” No explanation of how they lost him.

First two paragraphs:

The Edinburg High Bobcats and PSJA High Bears met Thursday night at Richard R. Flores Stadium to play a win-or-go-home District 31-6A zone play-in game that started off with a frenetic pace.

But the moment was bittersweet for the Bobcats, who lost their best defensive player during a 35-21 victory over PSJA High to advance to the Class 6A Division I playoffs, after an ugly moment during the first half threatened to derail the entire game.

So the lead is that the game had a good fast pace, and that tragically one side’s best defensive player was “lost.” But they won anyway! The still unspecified event that prompted the loss almost derailed the game… And an assault on a ref followed by four police officers dragging the player from the field would certainly derail a game anywhere outside of Texas; but why not take advantage of the points your side made as a result of the unhinged physical attacks and the cheating of your most admired player?

Oh, the article goes on to recount the attack; but look at the whole thing. Almost all of it is taken up with fans’ excited accounts of the win.

This blog has long covered our most revered college football players – the crazed giants led by Richie Incognito. Duron is king of the Edinburg world and will soon be fought over by recruiters from all the big football universities. He will soon be king of the world.

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PS: I’m always astounded at the fragile sensibilities of sportswriters. These guys are blown away (“unreal,” one of them writes) when violence like this happens on the field. Someone needs to tell them that it’s routine. German soccer officials get bodyguards.

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UPDATE: The school has withdrawn altogether from the playoffs and has apologized profusely. It’s a start. But the district faces a world of pain. Litigation. The worst imaginable global publicity. Huge money awards. Plus questions as to why their Incognito-in-Training wasn’t removed from football, given that he’d already been removed from soccer. Did the school think a differently shaped ball would mean different behavior? The sports-mad folk of Texas have a great deal to answer for, in so many respects. This is merely the latest disgrace.

Another Update: “Duron was charged with assault in Edinburg Municipal Court, a class A misdemeanor. If convicted, the charge is punishable by up to one year in county jail and a fine of up to $4,000.” That’s the least of his and his school’s problems. Because of the global attention to the case if nothing else (and he may have prior arrests/convictions), he’s liable to get some jail time; the school district may face an expensive lawsuit. It seems especially damaging and unfortunate for the particular school (coach, principal) that Duron was allowed to keep playing. Brace yourself for lurid tales of his off-field violence from friends and teammates.

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Mugshot. Adorable I’ll fuck you up too motherfucker expression on the lad’s face.

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MORE: And here’s what the players – gathering, with LET US PLAY signs in their hands, for a protest in front of the administration building – don’t get. It seems obvious to them – and to a lot of other reasonable people – that collective punishment is unfair. THEY didn’t attack the game official.

But they are in fact a collective, and collectively they represent a school, a school district, a town, even a local culture. What happened on their football field was grotesque — so grotesque that it has captured the disgusted attention of significant parts of the world, not just America. Something is wrong with Edinburg High School, not just with the dude who socked the official. It knew full well it had a monstrous person on its teams, and it removed that person from soccer. But not from football. Why the hell not?

Let UD tell you why. Because football is already an incredibly violent sport (soccer’s violence is all about the audience, with fans in some countries routinely staging fascist rallies while the game proceeds), with enormous tolerance — nay, admiration — of violence. You can just hear the coach telling the principal (assuming the principal even bothered expressing hesitation to him about Duron) that the dude is admittedly too hot-headed for soccer, but football suits his temperament fine. You can hear the coach reminding the principal (and is it a factor that he’s a man and she’s a woman?) that he’s the most valuable player on the team, and they’ve got to get to the playoffs. “They’ve played their hearts out all season. He’s learned from the soccer punishment. I’ll take responsibility for his behavior.”

Football culture up and down the line is pretty fucking twisted; but high school kids! Texas! Ain’t my place out here on Coastal Elite Coast to tell football-crazed Texan towns how to live; but I can tell them that we’re all watching, and when their way of life produces Emmanuel Duron we’re judging everyone down there, not just Duron. Durons are enabled by groups of moral idiots who can’t see past the next field goal. If students at Edinburg High want to be angry, they should be angry with their coach, their principal, and their superintendent. Those are the people who make Durons happen.

With the shocked and appalled eyes of the world on their little school, Edinburg needed to acknowledge its twistedness, and needed to make a strong reformist statement. Sorry, kiddies.

Violence is now so bad in German soccer – a referee remains in the hospital, recovering from quite serious wounds inflicted on him by a player who attacked him when he ordered the player off the field – that referees have gone on strike. On one team, bodyguards will be assigned in the future to game officials. Play on!

Wonder what’ll happen to the homicidal honey… Will they make him team captain, put on a parade in his honor, or give him the keys to the city?

… when she sees scathe-worthy writing, she rises to the occasion.

Here’s the SEC commissioner trying to get Mississippi university leaders riled up against the overwhelming passage, in that state’s House, of legislation clearly paving the way for conceal carry folk to bring their guns to football games. He intervened in the very same way when Arkansas tried to get guns in the hands of football fans; now he’s sticking his nose in the business of the good people of Mississippi. Here’s what he wrote to the chancellor of the University of Mississippi.

Given the intense atmosphere surrounding athletic events, adding weapons increases meaningful safety concerns and is expected to negatively impact the intercollegiate athletics programs at your universities in several ways… If HB1083 is adopted to permit weapons in college sports venues, it is likely that competitors will decline opportunities to play in Oxford and Starkville, game officials will decline assignments, personal safety concerns will be used against Mississippi’s universities during the recruiting process and fan attendance will be negatively impacted.

Yes, SOS hears you. ‘SEC Commissioner’ describes a position of dignity and gravitas. The SEC Commissioner is not in a position to say

I’m shitting bricks thinking about your wasted frat boys whipping out their AR-15s and blowing everyone away.

But he could still have done a better job of writing to the chancellor. Let’s consider how he could have issued his warning more eloquently.

There’s a stiff bureaucratic feel to the whole thing, isn’t there? And given that he wants above all to convey a sense of urgency, dead language of this sort does the opposite. Notice that he begins all bass-ackward, backing up to his point rather than stating it right out.

Given the intense atmosphere…

No. Start right off with guns. Guns make football games more dangerous, and they’re already somewhat dangerous. In other words, the whole intense atmosphere thing begs for clarification.

I mean, having for a long time read coaches and fans talk about university football games, UD would have thought ‘intensity’ in their regard referred simply to wholesome fellowship and partisan fun! No? Ok, then don’t leave me hanging: Is there something else intense going on at football games?

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Well, think about it, UD. Look around an SEC stadium during a game. Did you ever see so many police? Why do you think they’re there?

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But of course the commissioner doesn’t want to specify the nature of pre-addition-of-weaponry football game intensity, because there’s a large athletics industry supporting him and his family, and that’s nothing to fuck with.

So, along the same lines, he goes for the unbearably ugly negatively impact to try to delicately gingerly ever so lightly skip around …

Skip around what? Good writing is more direct than this. You’d have to be insane to add guns to crowds of drunk agitated immature males.

And now for the windup, which of course features a second use of negatively impact. Finds it so nice he uses it twice.

… it is likely that competitors will decline opportunities to play in Oxford and Starkville, game officials will decline assignments, personal safety concerns will be used against Mississippi’s universities during the recruiting process and fan attendance will be negatively impacted.

I wonder why football players, specially in the south, might not be happy to play in front of tens of thousands of Mississippi university students with big ol’ guns at the ready??? Hm. Hm. That’s a real poser.

But anyway… Let’s redo this final clause, shall we?

Pads and helmets can only do so much. Bad enough you’re concussing your head. You’re also putting yourself out there in a huge open shooting gallery with armed angry drunk southern males. Ditto for sitting-duck game officials. People get real angry at officials. In the pre-technological world of high school sports, you have to get up, run onto the field, and beat officials to death with your own fists. With guns, it’s a piece of cake.

Georgia will not hesitate to tell recruits trying to decide where to play that they definitely could get their asses blown off in Mississippi. As for your fan base: Though the lads’ aim might be wobbly from a few hundred feet, they’re for sure not going to miss the nice broad back of the guy two rows ahead who just called them a motherfucker. So your attendance numbers aren’t going to be enhanced. Unless you add all the new fans who are there to shoot off their guns.

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Yes, yes, SOS knows that she has slipped into the sort of language incommensurate with the moral stature of an SEC commissioner. Sorry.

A fight broke out on a field between opposing local college football teams.

Big deal. Happens all the time.

One of the players punched a referee trying to break up the fight.

Rarer, I grant you. But in the lovely world of football/soccer, not all that rare.

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Truly rare is the statement just released from the referee puncher’s junior college. Let’s have a look.

After closely reviewing video footage and interviewing those involved and outside witnesses, [Mt. San Antonio College] maintains that the student-athlete, Bernard Shirmer, unintentionally hit the referee. During a disagreement after a play, numerous people surrounded him and pulled him away from the opposing player. Out of frustration, Mr. Shirmer struck himself on the helmet, a habit he often does to calm himself down. In doing so, he inadvertently hit the referee and initially believed someone else had done so. Mr. Shirmer expressed deep remorse about the incident and any harm to the referee.

Talk about playing defense! When interrupted while fighting people, our lad calms himself down by hitting himself on the head. (Cue Monty Python.) Unable to find his own head, however, our player found himself hitting the referee, though in a strikingly dissociated moment, he was convinced someone else was hitting the referee. He’s really sorry about it now.