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Something about Bjork on Mars, and Some Guy’s Frozen Nuts…?

UD‘s having trouble making sense of this story. Give her a moment.


And here’s the obligatory I AM STUNNED TO DISCOVER THAT A (choose one from Column A)




is a super-sanctimonious-Christian fraud! You never see that combination at our universities! You never see a noisy pious moral scold who turns out to be a greedy horny cheating little shit!


Hearken, ye sinners! O list, ye lost ones!

The Hugh Freeze saga at Ole Miss haveth everything. It haveth the alleged recruiting violations, the former player on the holy draft night of 2016 who telleth of the cash payments, the aggrieved former coach (Houston Nutt), the disciples from the NCAA Committee on Infractions, the lawyers, the escort service, the “misdial” to the escort service, the suggestion from the athletic director that perhaps the “misdial” was part of a “pattern.”

It haveth the mingling of the gods on the fields and the gods in the sky.

“I don’t stand over them, make them do it,” coach Freeze sayeth of his players and his religion to Kent Babb of The Washington Post in 2014. “Certainly they hopefully see that it’s important to me and maybe the way I live and the way these other coaches live. Maybe it attracts them to it.”

The Twitter feed of the man from Independence, Miss., doth lineth with his Bible.

Here we seeeth the juxtaposition that will never stop astounding, the one that has breathed through the whole story of this most American of games since Rutgers playeth Princeton in 1869 and the legend goes that a witnessing professor hollereth: “You men will come to no Christian end!”

Here, a grubby game (and deliciously so) intersects with a peacocky purity.

Margaret Soltan, July 21, 2017 6:26AM
Posted in: forms of religious experience, sport

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5 Responses to “Something about Bjork on Mars, and Some Guy’s Frozen Nuts…?”

  1. john Says:

    When it rains, it pours!!

  2. Polish Peter Says:

    I don’t think the author got a very good grade in freshman expository writing.

  3. Margaret Soltan Says:

    Polish Peter: Yes, there was a weakness there. But I will admit to also just enjoying the list of players.

  4. charlie Says:

    UD, nothing more than your standard Southern Gothic tale. Flannery O’Connor would have been proud…..

  5. University Diaries » That peculiarly All-American stench of high-octane Jesusism + rancid personal perversion has always been a big part of the atmosphere of jockshops like Auburn University… Says:

    […] moral degeneracy. It would be too fictional to believe if it weren’t all true. But Coach Hugh Freeze is true, and Auburn is true, and Baylor is true, and Liberty is […]

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